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Young Writers Society


The Outlands [DT]



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Thu Nov 16, 2017 3:26 pm
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wakarimasen says...



Oh hey, I posted a thing! :D

Sorry it took me a while. :P

I feel like it's not a coincidence that right as I'm posting this, the footer quote reads "Remember: no stress allowed. Have fun, and learn from your fellow writers - that's what storybooks are all about.
— @Wolfical"
  





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Thu Nov 16, 2017 3:41 pm
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Lael says...



Wait, if James hadn't said his real name yet, how come the posts before Allison's say James in reference to him?

(And it's my turn, right?)
"And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:7
  





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Thu Nov 16, 2017 6:17 pm
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Wolfi says...



Thank you sound!!

Oh my gosh Al xD being in the quote generator makes me feel like a celebrity
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.
  





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Thu Nov 16, 2017 10:56 pm
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Featherstone says...



Well Ari is like the most chill dude on the planet so coming up with some horribly significant character development about a dark past or something just won't happen no matter how hard I try, so how about this:

Ardeshir really looks up to James so how about his whole character arc thing is about him trying to be like him? Like, trying to talk properly like James and get his approval and stuff? xD
"All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost."


he/him/his
  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 1:12 am
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soundofmind says...



@Lael yeah! It's your turn! (and we can collab if you want since it has the bounty hunters in ittt) And it looks like Allison fixed the name thing so yay!

AND YES omg if Kaia joined them that would be awesome. And amazingly awkward haha

@Wolfical you are a celebrity though

@FalconerGal9086 I LOVE IT. Omg I want to see that so bad. That would be so adorable :,0
Pants are an illusion. And so is death.

  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 2:33 am
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Wolfi says...



Pshawww

For some reason I guess I was busy and I hadn't read @FalconryGal9086's (edit: dang it xD) post yet?? It's fabulous! I love this line:
Meanwhile, Rosaleen and Brett were tag-teaming the former crossbowman - who, without a crossbow, was really just a man.
and also the stickers at the end of course!

And @AllisontheWriter dang you did such a good job with character personalities in your post! I appreciate that you included everyone so well.

I like the idea of the anti-magic peeps going after the gang! And griffins.

How do I want Brett to grow? I guess I want him to forgive himself. I think a lot of the talking and goofing around helps him forget for a little while the past he left behind, the successful twin brother, the two innocent sailors he killed. He likes talk because it drowns all that out - his regret, guilt, longing - but oftentimes he doesn't feel like he deserves it so he goes off on his own to sulk.

If he never forgives himself, I at least want him to be comfortable with sharing these negative feelings with others. Something that might help with forgiving himself is if his brother forgives him. I'd love to bring Matt into this somehow!

There should be a super scary-looking monster who they come into contact with and they think is about to kill them when it turns out all it wants is their stickers bars.
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.
  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 4:31 am
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soundofmind says...



@Wolfical oooho! yessss. YESSSSSS. Question: if he were to open up about it, who would you see him talking to? Everyone? Just one of them? Or a select few?

But seriously I would love to see Brett's journey of learning to forgive himself. I think that might be a really cool contrast to James, who's gonna have to learn how to forgive Rosaleen after she outs/backstabs him and another friend from his past. (James won't get to forgiving himself for a long time.

BUT HMMM how do you think we could bring in Matt?? I don't think they'll be going to the Isles... would Matt ever come to the Outlands for any reason? To find Brett? Or... business???? Idk. But I do think it'd be cool for us to maybe meet Matt. Or maybe Matt sends Brett like, a letter via messenger raven. (How do birds find people??? i will never know. it's a conveniently sized plot hole)

And aa I'm glad you like the idea of the anti-magic peeps. I think they'd make a fun antagonist. And YESSSSs good. GRIFFINS. You know, technically, most of the "monsters" in this world aren't technically "monsters," but most people in their world put griffins under that category. Griffins are just super territorial and don't like humans - for good reason though. Fun fact: in Rosaleen's hometown Ruddlan, they have a thing they call the Griffin Games. Think like, dog fights, but with griffins. And in a big, enclosed coliseum-like arena. Some random lore/facts for you

Also ooooh the super scary monster who just likes stickers bars sounds cool. Idk why when I think of animals grabbing food I think of monkeys. Maybe they could run into some not very friendly monkeys?? who just like stickers hahah and are all grabby

ALSO DITTO WOLFIE about @AllisontheWriter's wonderful post!! You did such a good job writing the characters and their personalities! And I love your character development on Adina. I like that she did a whole draft of a letter to her dad in her head. I loveeeeee that backstorryyyyyyy

gimmeeeee that backstoryy yesssss

@FalconerGal9086 OH YEAH you said you wanted Ari to get a kitten at some point, right? haha don't forget ,, it's very important lol
Pants are an illusion. And so is death.

  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 4:43 am
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Featherstone says...



YES ARI'S KITTEN
"All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost."


he/him/his
  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 4:53 am
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Wolfi says...



Brett's not like James in that he keeps his past a secret, but he does keep his feelings under wraps. I think whoever prods him enough will get it out of him pretty quickly. James probably wouldn't be that person. I could also see him not wanting to talk with Adina about it because he doesn't want to make her depressed or anything. Maybe Ari would be a good ear! They have their shared homeland as a connection of course.

I was looking at the Outlands map and I saw a coastal area in the north west corner of the Outlands. Matt could definitely be going by there anytime for trading! Or he could leave a message there somehow, knowing that Brett might be drawn to it because of the sea?

Wooooah I didn't realize that you already had griffins in the original lore! I really like that.

Monkeys! Yes.

((Ari's reminding me of Tanyenke now, sound xD))
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.
  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 4:55 am
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Featherstone says...



I volunteer Ari to be said ear.
"All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost."


he/him/his
  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 5:13 am
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Wolfi says...



Yay! :3
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.
  





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Fri Nov 17, 2017 5:22 am
soundofmind says...



Ari is a gem and I love him ((Tanyenke!!))

ALSO YES I LOVE BRETT AND yeah James would nooooooot be the person to talk to about feelings. James isn't able to give that kind of emotional support. He's too shut down and he can't bring himself to say comforting words he doesn't even believe himself.

I would love to see Ari and Brett become good friends and like, really learn to trust each other. I feel like they'll learn to get along really well togrther???

Also!! Ooo either of those things would work for meeting Matt/hearing from him! Which one do you like best?

And yesss. Griffins and monkeys and emotionalconflict! Oh my!
Pants are an illusion. And so is death.

  





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Mon Nov 20, 2017 6:13 am
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soundofmind says...



GUYS! WE MADE IT THROUGH ROUND ONE

James has three names now, let's see how confusing this gets.

I'd like to applaud @Lael for a wonderful ending post and for introducing our main antagonist for this next round. The beautiful, the deadly: KAIA NESBITT. Now get ready for...


-<>-

ROUND TWO

All right ya'll, so for Round Two, it's gonna be all hands on deck. And by that all I mean is I want to see us collabing!

As usual, if you have any questions or ideas for things you'd want to add or change that you think would be cool to add to the story, throw 'em at me!

I'll get my first post up this week!
Pants are an illusion. And so is death.

  





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Mon Nov 20, 2017 6:15 am
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Wolfi says...



Collaborating! <3
John 14:27:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.
I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled
and do not be afraid.
  





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Mon Nov 20, 2017 3:49 pm
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BrumalHunter says...



Challenged Adventurer(s): @Wolfical @Lael @AllisontheWriter @sherlockhson @falconrygirl9086
Storybook: The Outlands
The Challenge: ROUND ONE: THE GREAT ESCAPE

We're starting our first round of posts! Yay! So for our first set of posts one thing I'd love to see is your character interact directly with at least two other characters! Make them talk! Make them banter! I wanna see some words exchanged, ya'll! You will get one point for having your character talk with two of the others. You'll get another point if in the character talks you include them either disagreeing or agreeing on something. Sounds easy enough!

Also, you'll get one point if your post is over 700 words!

Completion Time: 30 days, 1 post
Credits Awarded: 3

Your challenge has expired! Good luck with the next one.
But the Fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
— Paul the Apostle

Winter is inevitable. Spring will return eventually, and AstralHunter with it.
  








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