should've known better

i knew from the start
it was all a lie

i want to love
i want to miss

i don’t want to be this cold,
but it’s my armour darling,
it’s my safety net and my coat

i want to smile
i want to dance

i don’t want to walk past you,
telling you, you don’t exist,
it’s hurting and tearing me

i want to be close
i want to be brave

i don’t want to end up like them

you say, i never call back
and when you see me again,
all i do is avoid you
still i get jealous when
i see you with someone else

this is me trying

i see the tears in your eyes,
even when you try to hide them
even when you say you’re fine

i miss the way you used to laugh
without a care in the world,
the world was at your feet
now you’re lost in it

i know that your heart is broken
but i want you to try,
i know its hard, i get the feeling
but please, try

i hate that your hurting,
but i know you need time
to work it all out

so when you’re ready, darling,
you know the number to my heart

don’t ask
‘cause you know
i won’t tell you the truth
the only thing i can tell you is that,
it’s complicated

Me to Larkin: "i heard you talking to the mirror"

(read from the bottom to the top!)

Yrros Ma I - Larkin to the mirror
Y ou have to understand, i have lost too
R ight now, i’m not sure what i feel anymore
R ight now, i’m not sure what to wish anymore
O verreacting or not,
S topping myself from feeling guilty,

M rs. became Ms once more
A lways became Never

I wish it wasn’t too late

Sunsets on Replay - Theo



Text Version:

Spoiler

Loving her is like a sunset on replay
If only you understood
How someone can love her

But how can you understand
How someone can love her
your never saw a sunset
without your sunglasses

- Theo, Harper's Sunset

gave you my heart
only to receive
broken shards
which looked
nothing
like my heart

- traitor

where there are flowers
there’s death and there’s craving
for everything is rotten
and all the prayers are for
eternal desire and to forgive,
the soil is not that naive
it's not wailing for water,
it’s weeping for tears, for blood,
for mystery, for trust, its yearning,
nothing comes that easy, not even the sun,
it's all a trick, an illusion, and for that
there’s spilled so much, sacrificed more,
not even a want anymore, a need, a have to,
for where there are flowers
there’s the roots of the problem:
it’s all pretend

my grandparents, an Orpheus and Eurydice
they should’ve spoken up

my parents, a Romeo and Juliet
they should’ve stayed silent

me, a daughter of love
i get it now, i understand it all

i’ve been blaming myself, holding myself back,
for something that was not even mine to deal with,
from something that was always mine before i even realised

for it was not me
they should’ve known better