Young Writers Society

Unpublished thoughts and unpublished feelings
Maybe they're little glimpses of my scheming
From unheard cries to a broth full of lies
Welcome to the first, the beginning, and the end of my demise.

Warning: Bunnies present munching on poetry stanzas. If you are allergic to cuteness, please take caution.
(Swearing will never be here, and everything will generally be family friendly. However, please check content warnings wherever present. Thank you.)

Comments welcome
Critiques welcome
Chickens welcome

Contents of Tables:

1. The Difference Between a Hero and a Villain
2. It Never Occurred to Me

The Difference Between a Hero and a Villain
Date Written: May 1st, 2024

I get why people fall into their own self-hatred.
It's because once they're there,
They think they deserve to stay.
Or I don't know; maybe I'm
the only one crazy enough to do it.
But I still understand why.

Because once you hate yourself so much that
When you make a mistake,
It feels like the end of the world.
Where that moment feels unbearable

People will tell you it's unhealthy for you
And that you should stop
But tell me something; why should I care?
(That was mean I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry)
If I hate myself so much
That it hurts to breathe
It hurts to move
It hurts to look at myself in the mirror and not cry at everything I promised I would never become,
Then do you think I care if it will only get worse?
(Maybe if it gets worse, then I'll finally try to change
Maybe I'll finally be the person I wanted to be
Even if I don't see it
And other people can enjoy the me I never had)

The only reason I'd stop
The only reason I want to stop
hating myself
Is because it hurts you.
And I know what it's like to have someone you love
hate themself.
I never want anyone to feel that way.

So if I can, I'll hide it.
I'll hide how much I can't stand my reflection,
And I'll smile at you in the mirror.
I'll hide how much it hurts when I make a mistake
And I'll lie and say I'm working on loving myself
(I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry)
I'll hide the ever present voice I use
To tell myself that I'm not good enough

If I shower you with compliments,
Do you think you'll forgive yourself for things you've done in the past?
I do.
I forgive you,
Let us forget, too.
Because it doesn't matter anymore.
Anything you did in the past is just that.
The past.
Please, forgive yourself
(Hypocrite hypocrite hypocrite hypocrite)
(I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry)

The difference between you and me
Is that you learn from what you did.
I've been repeating every wrong thing I've done
For the last nine years.
And I've never made a different choice.

The difference between you and me
Is the difference between a hero and a villain.
You stopped hurting me.
I never stopped hurting you.

It Never Occurred to Me
Date Written: May 6th, 2024

How come it never occurred to me
That there would be other people like me
That would hate being a girl as much as I did
(Except I wouldn't want to be anything else)
How come it never occurred to me
That other people would avoid school
The same way I did
(Though I used to love learning)
How come it never occurred to me
That there would be people that felt the same things I do
(I mean, I did understand...)
And how come I never knew
That my feelings would hurt theirs?
(And this time, I know it's true)