A "J" for "Joy"

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A "J" for "Joy", sweet peppermint bliss,
My favorite part of the holiday times.
Up and down the thin red stripes, a kiss
Of that unsatisfied craving of mine.
Shakespearian tongue-twister:

To sit in solemn silence
In a dark, dank dock
In a pestilential prison
With a lifelong lock;
Awaiting the sensation
Of a short, sharp shock
Of a cheap, chippy chopper
On a big black block.




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I love short, simple poetry about random things and I love those little peppermints :D
mintsnomnom.jpg
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My favorite part of the holiday times.
really? :D
This is a sweet poem - ha-ha-ha-ha :| - but I honestly don't get the relevance of the title.
It just doesn't make sense to me. I can't figure it out.
A "J" for "Joy", sweet peppermint bliss,

It's clever, though, to include that line in the poem as well. I guess that was the topic, or phrase that you were studying or working around.

Cool rhyming structure xD!!!
Emmzziee
(:
I want to play a game.




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Points 367
Reviews 165
Hmm...I'll have to edit this. It was supposed to be about candy canes. :P
Shakespearian tongue-twister:

To sit in solemn silence
In a dark, dank dock
In a pestilential prison
With a lifelong lock;
Awaiting the sensation
Of a short, sharp shock
Of a cheap, chippy chopper
On a big black block.




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Gender Male
Points 25520
Reviews 308
Hi, this is "A" for Al, giving a Quick Critique!

Concept & Theme: :D :D :D :D
I just don't understand it but, even though your poem is quite cut short, it gives this sort of satisfactory feeling which comforts me and tells my mind that "yeah, I completely understand this poem!" even though I didn't much. Is it maybe because you secretly put magic spells in this here pieces. Or maybe because you just made a piece with such great appeal! I simply love it! I still didn't quite get the theme though...

Content: :D :D :D :)
I like the colorful usage of words. There are sweet, cold, simple and more variations of words present in these short verses. I'm also quite happy to tell you that I liked the poem even though it didn't bring much verses because of the impact of the words. Creative!

Technicalities
I'd rather not give any comment or a Smile-o-meter here. It seems to short to notice any mistake!

Overall: :D :D :D :D
Although it didn't exactly appeal to me as a literary word, it bewitched me in its charms. The wonderful usage of words simply made me fall in love. The only thing I can say is that, your poem, although cut short and quite confusing, brought me a feeling called joy.

You're on there, so good luck!
Al
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Points 731
Reviews 37
Short, sweet, and to the point. I love peppermint and I completly agree with what you have said. Stay sweet.

Rarity
"And though she be but little, she is fierce."
-Shakespeare



Light griefs are loquacious, but the great are dumb.
— Seneca