Show me Heaven Fire

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Scientific statistics have so far proved that out of all professions, writers are the most likely to develop mental unstabilities.



You never forgot how to write, did you?
When nights are cold enough to make the
blackness shake in its shell,
nights where you can taste
your oxblood lips, speaking
spells and slinking truth in the
penned words – on these nights
you coax the dawn from darkness.
A sweet sultry sexuality.

No, you always recalled how the scratch of granite
made your heart race, how your hips danced
out every grinding desire blooming in you.
The desperation is finite, and it’s sick, dear Désirée
how the ice chinks are still in your veins
unmelted and bullet-sharp on capillary walls.
Absolute zero looms closer and closer, but your
caught on the second hand of the clockwork:
You’ve always hungered for the feeling
of not being able to sink any lower.

Pen scrapes the bottom –
(demons on the window lattice)
you’re already there.
Carpe Diem.




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This had beautiful language and imagery-but I'm confused. I love your poems, gummy, but sometimes I just can't figure them out. Nice job though!
"I will have to tell you, you have bewitched me body and soul..." --Mr. Darcy, P & P, 2005 movie
"You pierce my soul." --Cpt. Frederick Wentworth

Got YWS?




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Oy vey. Another lost cause. Does this make sense to anybody?
Carpe Diem.




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 1586
Reviews 402
Don't worry-I liked it, I really did. Simple language, with depth, is the best for poetry. You've got depth all right, but maybe try simplifying the language, just a bit. I promise you gummy, you're like seriously one of the best poets I know, but sometimes your poems can be confusing. Don't worry though! I'm sure other peeps are smarter than me and can get the complete meaning of the poem. Great, great job, and keep writing! ^_^
"I will have to tell you, you have bewitched me body and soul..." --Mr. Darcy, P & P, 2005 movie
"You pierce my soul." --Cpt. Frederick Wentworth

Got YWS?




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Points 9692
Reviews 3900
OMG!

Yes, that is SO true. Yes, yes, yes, yes! A sweet sexuality... it's like nothing can please you as much as you can please yourself, and it's so sick but sweet and just completely... yes!

My favorite part is this:

No, you always recalled how the scratch of granite
made your heart race, how your hips danced
out every grinding desire blooming in you.
The desperation is finite, and it’s sick, dear Désirée


It's like, you're setting something into stone and it's there FOREVER. And it's just so awesome because, though you can't express it with any intelligent speech, you can write it down. It's like you're going back to the caveman days and becomig wild.

Yeah. This is one of my favorite poems of yours, I got to admit. It's pretty and lovely and it speaks to me. :)
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D



who you become at your worst isn't who you are
— canopy