November

Here I am-
Standing on cold ground-
You're changed, since spring days
are now gone?
who once you were “your”
now you are not, my old friend.
You shared the precipitation of salt water, with pain and laughter.
I saw here in your hidden center a land of light.
Warm touches of repetitious wind words-
Admiration today alloys into the merging of adultery.
How dare you molest my words, the warm olive hands now stretch to-

Cold isolation has warped my in my journey.
To know you is deceit-
I cannot understand that which has been easily molded as stone
-in your center. You whisper that I speak of cold...
I shall forgive that lust love, if you transition to spring-
-Four winter of your comfort arrests the eye on a vain quest-
My soul and heart yearns to beckon for your sweet breath of heather;
Yet, tongue of snakes makes beauty a cavity.
-Please return to me, please come home Beloved






http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... =jeuIMeSSh

Please Note: It is rated 12+ for the complex meaning in the poem

It was good, very deep as well. Very open to discussion. That is good in a poem. Overall, I like it!

I think you're having some problems with your bbc code.

Wow, this is a nice piece of poetry!

Nitpicks:
1.

"your"

not sure if you should use speech marks, personally I would use ' ' instead.

2.

Cold isolation has warped my in my journey.

Double check your stuff for typo's.

But, overall, this is a nicely formed piece of prose poetry. I could imagine the scene and feelings inside my head, very well done!

Happy Writings! DNX :J

I really like this. I like the angsty way that you're addressing the world, comparing days that are weighted with problems to those of the beautiful spring. You're having trouble with your code thing obviously, but from what I can see of it, the format would be pretty cool if it was working right. I like the emotion of it, too, and the way it was more prose-ish than poetry-ish. The sort of vagueness of it also kind of makes its meaning applicable to everybody, which is always good. All in all, it's a solid poem. Good job, and keep writing. You're good at it.