Exhaustion

I cannot obey the call
while there is work to be done.
I cannot follow welcome rest
or succumb to sleep’s tender temptations
until the night waxes full.
My eyes are propped open by cotton balls
which blur in them and render the world opaque.
The synapses have slowed, often
their messages lost somewhere along the way.
The gentle hush seduces me
and some gentle god wipes away the whirring thoughts
as my head droops.
But I cannot obey the call just yet
for there is still aught to be accomplished.
I shan’t allow that blissful ease
‘till shadows fall long
and the moon passes the peak of its arc
across the spangled heavens.
I cannot obey the call of sleep until
I finish this woeful tedium called homework.

hahahahaha i think you just captured every teenagers mind-process after a few hours of homework, you definitely got mine, its cool though, you definitely have a point, and it makes sense, keep going with your writing, i cant wait to see more from you, Oh! by the way it was simple but i have the feeling you can do much much better, still loved it though.

Hi there, Sarebear!

This is one lovely poem you've got here. I love how you manage to give us a message with not-so-common words. And the end just made me tilt my head and laughed. But it was awesome! My suggestions would be... make stanzas, that'd make it easier to read and harder for us, readers, get confused. XD Another thing is... "God" is a name, make sure to write the first letter in uppercase next time.

That's all I've got to say. Great job!

~Solly<3

I really like this, it has a good flow and a good rhythm. Just to comment on the comment above, I don't thing "god" needs to be capitalized because you're not talking about one specific god. God only becomes "God" when you're talking about a specific god, like Jesus for example. So in other words, I like it the way it is .
The punctuation was (almost) perfect! Which, with my being a grammar Nazi and all, is not something I say often . There are a few more spaces where commas could be used, but that's just me being picky.
Keep writing, you did a great job on this piece, and the only advice I could give you would be to give it a bit more detail and emotion. Goodluck and goodjob!