The One Person

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You are the one person that has always been there for me.
The one person I can rely on.
The one person I can trust to keep my secrets.

The one person I can't live without.
The one person that makes my world go round.
The one person I always think about.
The one person that's always in my dreams.

The one person I cherish and care for with all my heart.
The one person that I will love forever and always.

The one person.
That is you.
Last edited by turtlethatroars on Sun Oct 23, 2011 11:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"the beauty of words. They can be many different things to many different people. It's all in how we listen. Or how we read." - Lyrical Inspiration (authors note) of Enemies and Playmates by Darcia Helle

-Formally tkpejb




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This is a quite good poetry. But i wish you could put more elements of poetry such as metaphor and simile and personification. I think instead of using the word 'relie' you should use 'Rely'. It is more appropriate. Practices make perfect. :D
Loving in secrecy is my specialty.
What if...I was never here in the first place.




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Points 1359
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I noticed a few grammar issues here. I'm afraid I am in a picky mood so I am really sorry.

The one person I can relie on.
In red should be spelt rely.

Roughly ever two lines you should have a comma instead of a full stop, this is poetry not a story.

The one person that makes my world go round

"The one person that makes my world go around" sounds better.

The one person that I love and always will.

Replace always will, it just doesn't sound right. You could use "The one person that I will love forever and always."

Overall, I'm not mad about it. It's not my thing and you do definatly need work on your spelling and way of putting things but overall you did try your best. Keep writing.
- angel007angel x



One of the things I love about YWS is the quote generator. For example, I'm reading a really serious work, and then I see "Moo. - cow" at the bottom of the page.
— Darlet