Cordicide

The title of this poem is one invented by me since I wasn't able to find an existing alternative. Cord or Cor in Latin means Heart and the –cide ending originates from "caedere" which means "to kill". The word 'Cordicide' henceforth literally means "Killing of the heart".If you for some reason find it inaccurate please let me know.

Note : I sometimes post poems as notes on my facebook account under the alias "Pseudonymous Rex". I just wanted to make it clear so that if someone stumbles across this there, he/she should know that this isn't plagiarised material.

--


Shrouded in silence, stood he on the threshold of insanity
Shrouded in silence, stood he who was erewhile mortal
His own bane
Wraith now, a demon erelong; he who shall transcend humanity.

Never Naive, yet ever an eager victim to the siren’s call
Wraith of fire, this merchant of fear
Ever deceived
By his own heart, the architect of his greatest fall
Through heaven, earth and sea, in Tartarus he fell
Loathing now what he had loved, doomed ever to burn in hate
Vowing never again to suffer
Tore out his heart, he who evermore was given to slow black rage.

Shrouded in silence, stands he still on the threshold of insanity
Shrouded in silence, stands he who knows not his fate
His own bane
Wraith now, a demon erelong; he who shall transcend humanity.

--

WOW NICE

First off, cool name. And second off, I hate reviewing poetry like this! Do you know why? I'm sure you do. It's because it is TOO DANG GOOD! This would sound amazing if you read it some where aloud and I encourage you to do that.

I love this part.

Shrouded in silence,stands he still on the threshold of insanity.
Shrouded in silence, stands he who knows not his fate.
His own bane.
Wraith now, a demon erelong, he who transcend humanity.

I really liked how you use this both at the begining and the end. They had a different feel to them in both places. When I read it in the begining I felt that it was almost a whisper of a stanza and in the end it was a completely different feel. As if the lines was meant to be bellowed as though from the pits of hell. I suppose I'm talking nonsense now, but that is how I felt. Your poem honestly stirred me.
Thanks for posting it.
One thing I might change is instead of writing 'transcend' write 'transcends'. But thats just me, feel free to ignore.
~DG

shantel101 wrote:WOW NICE

Thank you

Shrouded in silence,stands he still on the threshold of insanity.
Shrouded in silence, stands he who knows not his fate.
His own bane.
Wraith now, a demon erelong, he who transcend humanity.

One thing I might change is instead of writing 'transcend' write 'transcends'. But thats just me, feel free to ignore.
~DG

First of all, thank you for such a wonderful response.
And I would but your forgot "shall" in the last line of the quoted part