Think Twice

I don't really consider myself to be a poet but this idea came to me yesterday and I decided to give it a try.
Any and all comments are much appreciated
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I want you to want me and know you can’t have me.
Lay awake Sobbing even though it helps nothing.

I want you to feel Loneliness coming,
With the fear and the hurt and the pain and the longing

I want you to fear the days you’re Alone.
With no distractions, your mind will roam.

I want you to feel the intense Struggle,
Of loving someone and not being able to tell them.

I want you to feel how Exhausting it is,
To wait and hope that something might give.

“Maybe this time when we talk he’ll be Nice.
Things will be better; it’ll be worth the fight.”

Maybe this time he’ll say “It’s okay.
I’m here for you, I Care, I feel your pain.”

I want you to feel Misery as you fight alone.
While trying to stay positive and maintain some hope.

I want you to feel the Torturous pain,
Feel your mind go in circles not accomplishing a thing.

“Is she better than me? Did I do something Wrong?
Do they do similar things? Is he glad that I’m gone?”

I want you to know what it’s like to be me.
Feel the horrible pain a Broken Heart brings.

Not for your sympathy, apologies, kind words,
But so someday you’ll think twice before doing this to Her.

You should work on your rhythm, not all of the stanzas flowed very well. Particularly the fourth stanza, and seventh and tenth. they sounded choppy. And the last stanza could have been better, especially since it's the last one, it should wrap up the whole poem. However, I liked your theme, and you did an excelllent job of portraying what you wanted to say. You had good emotion and wording. I especially liked the capitalized words. they made those words stand out and feel more real. So, all in all, great job, just work on your flow a bit more, otherwise, it's great!

Nice. I found it to be very interesting. It was written realistically--jealousy, the hatred for the heart break-e, but the longing to be loved. Also, despite the bitterness for the next girlfriend who replaced you--you somewhat "hope" that he doesn't treat her the same way as he did you (well mostly lol). Some parts you may want to change, add a little more descriptive words. But 8/10 is my review. Good job!