Sidhe PD Chapter 1

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Chapter One: Explosions in the Night

Darkness pressed in close in the abandoned part of town. With only a few street lights, vision was difficult and the warehouses loomed above anyone on the streets. Inside of the abandoned warehouses wasn't that much better, even on the second floor of one looking out of the window, Cedric felt closed in and intimidated by the buildings. He couldn't help but think that they were dangerous; gaping with several broken windows that almost looked as if they were going to eat someone. As a rookie beat cop, he knew the dangers of walking in abandoned places like this easily enough: even the police chose to patrol this area with a car rather than walking during the night.

Yet, even though the warehouses were empty at this time of night, light still shone out from the window across the street. Cedric wasn't surprised by this event, in fact, he had chosen the building that he currently was crouched in, peering through dirty, broken windows, because it was directly across from where the people had set up. His task for the night was to observe their actions.

A soft rain poured down from the sky, but that didn't deter the people sneaking into the dark mouth of the warehouse. The intermittent wind blew droplets of rain into his face, but Cedric didn't let that bother him. Instead, it seemed to bother his companion, who cursed and backed away every time that it happened. Useless, since the wind usually stopped the moment after they got hit by the spray, but the green haired man didn't let that stop him.

The green haired man ducked away from the spray coming in from the window once more, cursing under his breath. He stayed down until he was sure that the wind was gone before he stood back up and leaned against the window pane. He looked out to the warehouse, resuming watching, and didn't say a word against the rain.

"I don't understand why we can't just do something about this," Cedric said. He glanced at the green haired man out of the corner of his eye. "And then you can get out of the rain, Lorcan."

"That won't work, I've told you, it's not the time to act just yet," Lorcan replied. He wiped at his face. "Besides, it really isn't that bad."

"Then why don't you stop ducking out of the way every time a breeze comes," Cedric grumbled. He stared at the building. "What are they doing this time around?"

"Yet another ritual, just the like the other ones, to solidify this place," Lorcan said.

"Solidify?" Cedric asked. He watched as the lights started to darken in the window of the place across from them. It was about time for the ritual to start and he knew from the other ones that he had witnessed that strange lights would soon appear in the windows.

Lorcan sighed. "I've told you before; they need to anchor several places before they can attempt the ritual that they want."

"That's right," Cedric said. He leaned against the window frame, being careful not to lean onto any glass. It was something that Lorcan had explained to him several times, but he still wasn't totally sure about the details. Magic wasn't something that he often had to deal with; when all of his interactions were just on the streets and wearing his jacket inside out seemed to work for all of those.

"Just keep watching," Lorcan said. "We need to watch to see all of the events so that we know how to divert the flow of the final one."

"I don't get why I have to watch, though," Cedric said. The lights flared green in the window across from them and Cedric winced. The ritual was underway and more strange sights would be seen before it was over. And so, he continued to watch. "I mean, in the end, you're the one who knows how to get this all done, right?"

"I keep telling you that you're important, you know," Lorcan said. He ducked back from the wind and the water that it carried with it and sighed. Instead of going back to the window, he started pacing on the space behind Cedric.

Cedric could hear the crunching of all of the debris on the floor and he knew that Lorcan was doing it on purpose. If he wanted to, the green haired man could simply pass through the debris without making a sound, but he knew that Cedric would prefer if things went the way that it was supposed to when Lorcan was around him.

"I am watching," Cedric said. "It looks like they're going about it all of the same. Flashes of green and red light and weird shapes created with smoke. I am surprised that more people haven't noticed these strange rituals."

"People don't notice what they don't want to notice," Lorcan said. He continued crunching along behind Cedric. "It's not like they really remember the strange things that they see, either. You are the odd one out, for spending so much time with us."

"Like I have a choice," Cedric muttered. He winced again when a smoke tiger poured out of the building. It looked monstrous and Cedric wished that he could duck out of sight. Still, eh knew that they were just illusions and there wasn't anything that would bother him. No, the real test was going to be after the ritual was over. A flash of what he would just have to say was black light emitted from the building and Cedric nodded his head. "The ritual is finished. I am guessing that it went according to plan."

"This is the central one, so we should get ready to move," Lorcan said. He stopped pacing and started to gather up the stuff that had collected while they waited for the ritual to start. They had to come ahead of time, before anyone else had come and so then he couldn't do anything about the mess that had collected. But, they only had to take the things that they had used, which basically meant pocking up a back and that was it.

Cedric continued to watch, seeing the lights go back to a simple yellow light and seeing people start to leave. He sighed to himself. “And now’s about the time where they’ll light the building on fire.”

“It’ll take a while for it to be noticed,” Lorcan noted. He came up to the window and rested his hand on the window frame above Cedric’s head as he peered out at the rainy darkness. “This is an abandoned area, after all.”

“I’ll put in a call from my burn phone as we leave,” Cedric replied. He continued to keep his eyes trained on the window, waiting for the familiar flickers of the fire to start. That was the pattern, but he frowned as a feeling came over him. “Strange.”

“What?” Lorcan asked, looking down at him.

“They haven’t started the fire yet,” Cedric said. He glanced down at the street and watched as the last few gleams of lights held by dark figures in black clothes stream down the street. “They just left without starting the fire. Do you think it’s because this place is abandoned? It would be impossible to tell which warehouse the ritual took place in when they all practically look the same.”

Lorcan glanced out the window and then flung himself at Cedric. “Get down!”

Lorcan collided with Cedric and both of them fell to the ground. Lorcan stayed on top of him and Cedric blinked in bewilderment just in time to keep the flash from blinding him. A loud roar filled the air and light pressed down on his eyelids until he no longer saw black. He could hear thunks of something hitting the floor and the tinkling of glass intermixed with the thunder and the heavy rain. Slowly it faded to a dull roar of an ordinary fire and Lorcan sat up.

He barely gave time for Cedric to think that the building had actually exploded before he grabbed onto Cedric’s wrist and hauled him up. Without speaking a word, Lorcan tugged Cedric out of the room and down the stairs. Wary of watchers, they ducked out through the back entrance of the warehouse. They crossed the street to enter into a different warehouse to continue their journey away from the scene of the crime.

“I don’t think that there’s a need for you to call the fire company,” Lorcan said when they were far enough away.

Cedric blinked, the imprint of the explosion still trapped beneath his eyelids. “I suppose not.”

“The time is soon,” Lorcan said. He glanced up at the smoke that was covering the stars as they emerged from yet another warehouse. “We’d better start preparing.”

“I never thought that this would actually happen," Cedric said as he shook his head. He continued to walk alongside Lorcan, however. “I take it that I should call in sick to work?”

“That would be a good idea,” Lorcan said. He twisted something in the air ahead of him and motioned for Cedric to step through. Cedric frowned and took a step forward. Lorcan joined him a second later. If anyone else had been there, it would have been like the two just disappeared from view. If they had gone over to sweep the area, they would not find anything. The human and the Faery were no longer there.
Some people fall in love and touch the sky.
Some people fall in love and find Quicksand.

- Incubus




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Hello! This piece caught my attention from the title, and is the first piece tonight that i havent had to quote for errors.

The first section, spelling, gets an A+. I found nothing wrong with the spelling in this piece, so good job!

Second, grammar also gets an A+. I found nothing wrong here either. You are doing really well so far.

Third, flow. How the piece blends. I give this an A, only because there were a few rough patches, but nothing major. (Highest grade in this section tonight!) Excellent job!

Finally, you get another A+ in punctuation and capitalization. I am glad that I did not have to criticize here.

Report Card:

Spelling:A+
Grammar:A+
Flow:A
Punctuation/capitalization:A+

Final grade: A+

Truly excellent! Exquisite! This is probably the best grade I have and will give all night! I cannot wait to read more! So Great job, and good luck in the future!




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This sounds a lot like a series i read called the Dresden Files and an other story of mine which features a half fairy doctor, who also solves mysteries part time. The title was rather eye catching.

Nice scene setting, not overly flowery which is good. My only qualm is that 'Cedric' is not a 'cop's' name but apart from that its good, nice entry and you have already told us a fair amount about your MC.
Oh and just a note, since you have used the name Cedric just watch for stereotypes, not saying that your MC is ( he seem far from it actually).

You seem to also 'tell' a little, try 'showing' more. A narrative can be more than just actions and feelings. Also try and expand your descriptions out of 'sight' and try using more 'sounds', 'smells' etc.

I like how the story is progressing, both your characters seem very interesting. Like the other reviewer said your grammar seems fine, but I'm bad at spotting those things.
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The best and most beautiful things in the world can not be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart.
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