Oh Tree, Little Tree

Spoiler

This poem may sound pretty babyish, but I wanted to write something short ans simple, and this is what came to me.

Oh tree, little tree,
my heart does envy you;
who is there to greet the sun,
and grasp the morning's dew.

Whose friendly shadow
gently cloaks the weary,
and whose leaves bring life
to the landscape so dreary.

Standing firm through passing years,
but your song begins to fade,
as your shadow lets in more light
diluting your gentle shade.

Your life is now all but gone,
for your time is through;
oh tree, tall tree,
how I feel for you.

****
Thanks for reading

Me gusta! It's cute!

>ismertmoredetailedreviewhere<

-Jojo

I liked this poem, it had a homey feel to it. Like apple pie or orange juice. I loved the first stanza, it introduced your poem well. Your poem is well written!!!

shiney1 wrote:
Oh tree, little tree,
my heart does envy you;
who is there to greet the sun,
and grasp the morning's dew.

Whose friendly shadow
gently cloaks the weary,
and whose leaves bring life
to the landscape so dreary.

Standing firm through passing years,
but your song begins to fade,
as your shadow lets in more light
diluting your gentle shade.

Your life is now all but gone,
for your time is through;
oh tree, tall tree,
how I feel for you.

Very simple and child-like. I, personally, think it could've been more descriptive on trees. How old are they, the color of the leaves. Was it a pine tree? A willow? The rhyming was cute and easy to detect; the verses were short but sweet. I liked it.

Good job. Keep writing.

- Ariel<3'

heey my shiney one!
Here I am to review! I want to start off with saying that I really like this poem..It might be short and simple but it's totally cute and gives me a happy feeling. This shows that poems don't have to be all complicated to be a good poem. I couldn't find anything in this to nitpick on so congratulations on that!
That is pretty much all I have to say.. XD
Love it and keep writing!
-qaralynn-

This is kind of a rhymey cutesy poem. I'm not great with poetry, but I think it depends on what you were going for as to how good the poem is. It's simple and nice, but maybe you should use some more imagery. It's hard to make a perfectly neat little rhyming poem like this, so I give you props for that. Overall, I think it's pretty good but lacks a little bit of an imaginative touch. But I liked it.

Nice. I like it. It's simple and beautiful.

However a rhyme feels a little forced. Specifically: weary and drear feels a little forced to me. Other than that, I like it! well done and there's not much more to say here apart from keep writing good stuff like this!

This poem was quite delightful to read, I enjoyed it! It was longing, yet hopeful and just cozy.. if you know what I mean
I don't have much complaint to come with, like the structure, it's orderly and makes both rythm and flow go on amazingly...eeh, imagery - yes, there could be more but it's not bad as it is. So, overall I really feel like giving you 5 cozy spiders for making me happy with this poem! (And I didn't find any of your rhymes forced (Y))

Good Luck & Keep Writing

// Demoness