Daddy

Oh my gosh. This is so sad. I'm so sorry. Sometimes I feel the same way, even though my dad is still here in my life. He's a workaholic and even though he's here, he's not here at the same time. This is very touching and you did a wonderful job. Again, I'm sorry that he left.

Keep on Writing
-Roxy

a very touching and moving poem that touched both my heart and soul

Keep up the good work and don't give up.

Hi Amberchelli! I think this is a beautiful and touching poem.

Echo090 wrote:You seems to be very depress. If this poem is ever based from reality, then I am so sorry for you. The poem was very touching. Easy to read but it lacks a lot of formality. Were you in a rush? No capitalization and the structure of the lines was AWEFUL. So awful that if this was not easy to read, I would have changed the webpage. One line was like what? One word. It doesn't even have the same amount of syllables from the others lines. Read it as a sentence, and it was perfection. Read it as a poem, it sucks.

Echo, I'd like to respectfully disagree. Poems don't have to have the same amount of syllables as the other lines, or any form at all! e.e. cummings was one of the greatest poets of all time and he used very little or no form in most of his poetry. Instead of just saying how much a poem sucks, it would be nice to elaborate and explain how the poet could make it better.

My favorite part:

Amberchelli wrote:I hate you.
I love you.
I miss you.

In its simplicity, this stanza perfectly expressed how it feels when someone you love does something unforgivable, something that should lead you to hate them.

I have no negatives for this poem. Great job!

Whoa. That's.....so sad but a good lil poem....I loved it. You didn't capitalize the "I"s as much as you should have (somebody probably said that already though ) but overall you did great.

hey.. so I'm reading it and my dad is sitting besides me.. and I start crying!! It was so touching and moving, and emotional and lovely!! It made me see what a great man my father is.. Now i'm not going to be able to imagine a day without him in my life.. Thanks for writing such a brilliant poem!! Loved it immensely!!
Harshita:)

I personally like the lack of formality (though some things could be fixed... which is mentioned above). I feel like it stylistically adds to the tone, which by the way was very good! I like the shortness of each line... I just could feel all the emotions in it. I think it could have been shortened a TEENSY bit, and a few of the line breaks are questionable... But it's stille very good. This made me very sad you did a great job!