Unfolding the painful truth

It began unexpectedly on the bleachers beside the pool.
Summer gave no hints on what it had in store for us.
I was oblivious but you knew all along.
Sparks eased into a fire - a small gentle fire that we began to feed with every conversation, smile and symphonies of laughter.

We fell inlove as our moments together turned into hours.
The following summer when I look to my side, you sat beside me
The only difference this time was that a tremendous friendship had developed throughout the year.
Our kisses were full of passion and our talks filled with meaning.

The summer that was next in line was one that lacked heat in our flame.
You were next to me still, but yet you felt so far away
Our conversations were filled with words of interest and care but lacked honesty.
My feelings that once led me to dream of marriage, began to diminish.

Although our romance ended, our friendship shouldn't have.
My feelings may not have been the same as our initial summer together but they are the reason I still care about you.
Losing a boyfriend is hard but losing a friend is an ordeal that brings more sorrow to my heart.
May my true feeling be known to you soon and our friendship begin once again, growing each day without destruction

I really liked this piece, it meant a lot to me and probably to a lot of other people. The term the same doesn't feel the same really came to mind as I read this. How you can go through the same motions withsomeone and not change a thing... but you're feelings change in the process. There are a few things I would change, most involving the first line of each stanza, I think it can be represented in a better way instead of saying the first summer, the summer after that, after that. Other than that, this is a really good piece. Great way to capture emotion =]

Also, I really liked the imagery. I was imagining the bleachers, the heath, the metal burning the bottom of my legs. Really well done =]

This is very well-written. Like many, I could feel the pain you were trying to interpret. Although it was more of a dull pain since "unfolding this truth" was shorter than I expected. Ha-ha. There are only a few things I would revise though. One would be when you wrote "smile and symphonies of our laughter." symphonies should be singular since everything else in the list is singular, and it would flow better. And the second thing is when you wrote "and when I look to my side you sat beside me." look should be past tense ...if I am correct about this piece being in past tense. Otherwise, this was a lovely piece of writing.

This piece is really well written, and when I started reading it, the poem almost soundedd like a long story that somebody had to tell, yet only shorten it with ryme. I could feel the girl's pain of loosing somebody she loved, and yet that feeling can be shared within alot of people, about the feeling that holds thier soul when somebody they cared for just swepted away.

Of course, nothing can be perfect. Even though I'm not very educated in the writing of a poem, I did notice something. In the begining of each paragrapgh, according to this, the begining of each line seemed to of start with the season, though the poems of what I read started out with an almost identical line in each verse.

Overall, I don't see any changes that you have to make, and this poem is a lovley piece and gathers images in my mind of the scenes, and how perfect they were for each other and then they fall apart. This almost brung a tear to my eye, from the sheer emotion that was brought out, even though it wasn't described.