Midnight (Part 2)

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This would probably make more sense if you read part one. So,here is part one, if anyone's interested. But you don't have to read it. Although you might get a bit lost. Critiques and thoughts are still more than welcome if you haven't read part 1. :)



I woke up in my bed. Wondering what that dream was about. It seemed so real. Like an answered prayer of some sorts. Confused, I let the dream come back to me. Trying to decipher what it means. The words raced through my mind.

Child of the moon. Artemis' soul. Gift of the hunt.

It had not dawned on me before. But maybe, I could go hunting.

The sun was still rising. No one was up and about yet. I still have time. I stepped out of my bed and stole out of the house pausing only to borrow Alois' hunting gear. I will return it later. I'm sure he won't mind.

I had the pitch of arrows slung behind my back and the bow held firmly in my hand. The weapons felt familiar and strong in my hands. As if there's living pulse in them. They felt alive. As I walked further on, I found that, subconsciously, I knew how to use those weapons. I knew that I had to pull the bowstring back to my chin and stand side on. It was as if I had been doing this for a long time.

Preoccupied with my thoughts, I found that I had somehow found my way to the edge of the hunting ground. The grass here was long and green. There was a few trees scattered about, providing shade here and there. So this was where Alois went when he goes out hunting with his friends. I was always curious as to what the place looked like. It was as brilliant as I've imagined it.

I waited, under the shade of a great oak tree, looking out for an animal of some sorts.

I was alerted out of my pleasant reverie by a soft sound to my right. I paused to listen, it was the sound of footsteps on the damp grass. I turned my head to see a deer nibbling on some grass. Its neck arched gracefully, unaware that I was right behind. I was sorry that I had to shoot it, but I shoved the thought out of my head, I knew that having thoughts like that would get me nowhere.

Slowly, I pulled the bowstring back, standing in my stance, I let the arrow fly. It cut through the air like a dolphin would water. The arrow lodged itself just behind the deer's front leg, between where the ribs would be and straight to the heart. I watched the deer as it was shocked to a standstill, before collapsing to the ground.

Astonished, I just stood and watched. The reality slowly sinking in. I had shot a deer. I had just shot a deer. The triumph lasted for about two minutes. Before I worried myself about what I should do next. Do I just leave the body here? Or should I do something else?

The sun was already up, shining brightly. I can hear the soft chatter of the townspeople blown here by the winds. I should go. Mother and father would be awake. They'd be worried. Without further thoughts on the deer, I sprinted for home.

The countryside was a blur to me. I briefly saw some people turn their heads to look at me and then turn to whisper with their friends.

'It is the cursed one.'

'The midnight child lives.'

'Look at her queer pale body.'

The fleeting snippets of their whispers were not lost to me. I knew that if I paused to listen, I would be tempted to speak and their already pillaging opinion of me would go plummeting down yet again. With all my will, I ignored them all and focused on the thought of getting home.

It wasn’t long before my I saw my house and leaning ever so causally against the doorframe was Alois. I noted how beautiful it is when the sun caught his eyes and hair. They flashed a brilliant gold. His eyes caught mine and his lips broke out into a smile.




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I have no nit-picks! This was truly awesome! I loved it all!

Please PM as soon as Part 3 is out!

The countryside was a blur to me. I briefly saw some people turn their heads to look at me and then turn to whisper with their friends.

'It is the cursed one.'

'The midnight child lives.'

'Look at her queer pale body.'

The fleeting snippets of their whispers were not lost to me. I knew that if I paused to listen, I would be tempted to speak and their already pillaging opinion of me would go plummeting down yet again. With all my will, I ignored them all and focused on the thought of getting home.

It wasn’t long before my I saw my house and leaning ever so causally against the doorframe was Alois. I noted how beautiful it is when the sun caught his eyes and hair. They flashed a brilliant gold. His eyes caught mine and his lips broke out into a smile.


^^ Love IT! ^^

This definately deserves a follow.
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Again, the description is beautiful; I can really picture the countryside in my head. I still can't connect with midnight too well, perhaps as the story progresses even further it might be resolved. So I suggest maybe trying to get into Midnight a little more? Describing her personality, her habits, make her into a 3D person.



I always knew that deep down in every human heart, there is mercy and generosity. No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People must learn to hate, and if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart than its opposite.
— Nelson Mandela, Long Walk to Freedom