“Dear Mom,
It has been ages since I last saw you. My work here in Chicago is both rewarding and troubling. It consumes my every thought, my every action. I am on a campaign, and although you beg me to come and visit, I cannot. Not until people have learned the truth and have seen the things I have seen. Sometimes, I lay in bed at night and think of the day’s work; sometimes I cannot sleep because I feel I am not doing enough.
I must go; another day is calling me to work.
Sincerely,
Charles Teething”
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“Mom,
It is me again; I must speak to someone about this. Today, the walls of the world opened up to me in such a way I had never seen. It was an honor to behold, and a pleasure to service. Never have I dealt with someone who took such care to guard against the demons that would seek to ruin us. She informed that although she does splurge into the sweet, delectables that most people indulge in, she keeps it to a minimum. It is as if she was sent from the heavens to give me faith that my message is being heeded. Pristine white filled my vision and it was hard for me to even think of anything else. My head swam with the remembrance of her even after she was gone. I feel as if I must see her again although I know it will be at least half a year before my sight is gifted again.
I need some air.
Charles Teething”
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“Dear Mother,
Perhaps I was quite over my head last time I spoke with you, my apologies. It is rare for me to come across a specimen such as that lady and it quite overwhelmed me. Today was quite different. My day was spent with a multitude of children, all ages and all attitudes. Of course there were some that cried upon seeing me, some that hid behind their mothers and some who screamed bloody murder. All of which was most offensive considering the great service I was performing. Trying to enlighten these youngsters, and improve their lifestyle so they may live in health for years to come was unsuccessful. It appears the younger the subject, the harder it is to focus their attention. Perhaps I should look into an alternate method of education, would it be so bad to scare them into submission?”
My thoughts on this later,
Charles Teething.”
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“Mom,
It seems that if you show pictures of destruction to children their parents will take away their business and curse at you. However, as I pointed out to these close-minded fools, it is not without just cause. My steel instruments may seem cruel at first sight but with the knowledge that they provide a good, clean service does their perception not change? This was my intention when placing those images before the children. To scare them into realizing this is what might befall them should they not listen to me. It was merely meant to be educational. I am trying to provide a healthy life for these kids. Those kids need me in their lives, or perhaps, maybe not me, but others like me. Although, I know there are people out there who do not show the same dedication that I do to our task. Some people even say I am crazy for behaving the way I do. THEY are the crazy ones for not taking ownership for the things they do.
I’m sorry mother, I am worked up.
Charles Teething”
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“Mother,
It seems that upon losing those children’s business because of their parent’s fear of my methods, I have more free time and less time at work. This causes me great anguish and a slight sense of desperation. How else are people going to realize the seriousness of what faces us? I have begun looking into billboard prices and am thinking of purchasing one along the freeway with a large message placed on it. I am debating about a general distress message or perhaps one promoting my business. Do I increase my clientele to spread the good word, or inform the general public?
Charles Teething”
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“Mother,
I have contacted the billboard company and am in negotiations with them about pricing. Who knew it could cost so much to advertise oneself? However, I think it is for the good of the city. People will notice, people will listen, and people will change! I have seen enough damage from the sweet side of the world to know that something had to be done. Our bodies can’t always have what it wants; luckily mine is now well trained to turn in disgust from synthetically colored delectables. Do not fear, I can train yours as well if you would like. This is a future goal mother; re-condition people to feel fear in the face of these harmful products.
I am so proud of myself.
Charles Teething”
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“Charles! For goodness sakes! You are just a DENTIST! Please do not scare your patients with threatening images of cavities and such nonsense. Of all the things in this world to be scared of I’m sure that the threat of mouth infections and less than perfectly clean teeth aren’t high on people’s minds. And don’t you DARE waste your money taking out a billboard. You listen here mister, you are a grown man! You cannot frighten children with scary images or people will think you’re crazier than you already are!
Furthermore, there is no need to write your emails in letter format. It just makes you look silly. If you wish to write in letter format then send me an actual letter! Now, you WILL come home and visit and you WILL NOT speak about dentistry or the plights of plaque while you are here. I expect you home in 2-3 days or I’ll know why. No excuses.
Love,
Mom
P.S I LOVE SWEET DELECTABLE CANDY
Spoiler
Here is my topic I was given: A dentisit in Chiacago is emailing their mom
