Do you think Julius is speaking too much here? Does this peace need more dialogues or to show her reaction and not tell them?
Thanks for helping me. I truly appreciate it. Thank you.
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“Julius,” she called and approached me. “Here, drink some coffee before the day starts,” she said softly. She offered me a green over-sized mug in a pair of shaking hands.
“No, thank you,” I muttered, not for an instant had my eyes leave the screen of my phone.
“You’ll need your concentration,” she urged and raised the mug, as though to make me smell the coffee.
I looked up slowly to watch her with narrowed eyes. I was really annoyed and she seemed to be professional in choosing the least adequate moments to speak with me. And how could she smile like that all the time? It was disgusting, how giddy she was in the darkest days of our lives.
“Weekends are usually busy and you’ll—“
"And are you the maid around here?” I asked and shot her a scornful look. “I said I don’t want any.”
I didn't know if it were the look or the tone of disgust that forced her expressions to change. A low gasp parted her lips when I voiced those words, and the green mug in her hands was shaking even more tremendously. It was as though there were an earthquake centered only beneath her own feet.
Was I that vicious? I asked myself in wonder, when her eyes widened and stared up at me in a pure and flawless look of horror. She was certainly being overly dramatic with those lips that trembled in what I didn’t know was fear or shock.
That very thought was just forming in my mind, when her head bowed in defeat before me.
Was she that affected by what I said? I received the answer at once, seeing two droplets of tears falling from her eyes and into the mug. She looked so helpless, her sobs growing louder and her shoulders started to shake in rhythm with her loud breathing. But she never raised her head or even looked at me from behind her bangs.
I put my phone in my pocket and as I tried to clear my mind and think of the proper words I ought to say. The annoyance and discomfort I felt earlier gradually faded like streams of vapor from my chest, only to be replaced by that terrible guilt. Such horrible and unbearable guilt that increased while I listened to her gasping sobs.
I parted my lips to voice a few words, an apology perhaps. But the incomprehensible words that spilled from her lips interrupted me.
“I… I just… You…”
“Aurora, I didn't mean it,” I whispered. But I meant it, only that I didn't think she'd react in such a way.
Before I finished the sentence she had whirled around on her heels and sent her black hair flying behind her. In rapid paces, she rushed to the staff room without another word.
I tutted and ran my fingers in my hair. I was frustrated to see her so defeated for a few words that I didn’t, at the very least, think twice before I uttered them. What was I to do? I wasn’t having the most joyful of thoughts and people did come to say rude remarks every now and then. I wasn’t the only indecent person on this planet, was I?
Should I apologize?
I knew I should have, but I didn’t. Words of apologies were things that I had never been accustomed to. I had the slightest hint of what I was supposed to say, and it was a simple “sorry”.
What did that mean? Sorry. A mere meaningless word that expressed nothing of my fading conscience that was only starting to awake. It was true- I couldn’t deny it- that I was a terribly ill-mannered person. But, surely, I didn’t like making girls cry.
And so, a week had passed and I never apologized. In my defense, words became less fulfilling when I kept treating her worse everyday. It wasn’t my personal goal to make her life miserable, but I truly acted that way around everyone in the store- colleagues and customers- and not only her. But I wasn't doing that without a reason!
Too much problems was I forced to go through. They were very overwhelming that I barely managed taking a breath to face another enervating day. I thought I'd be relieving my soul from the horrors of my past when I came to this place, but it was more than surprising to experience the absolute opposite.
Owing Selim thousands of pounds wasn't something to sleep on every night, while he didn't allow me to hand him one dime. Meeting bandits in the street every other day became as usual as meeting lost animals in dark alleyways. Ah, and many more issues that showered my weak mind. Until when will I have to endure that?
And so, it was only normal for terrible words to make exit from my lips out of stress. At least, that was how I excused my attitude. The strange thing was this: Aurora was deeply affected by my indecent words, even when they were spoken to someone else. Was she that sensitive?
Feeling hurt merely because a cuss word reached her earshot wasn’t something to be considered normal. Am I not right?
She stopped making me coffee, of course, finally understanding that I didn’t like it. Even though we had our lunch break in the same time, she did her utmost effort to avoid speaking to me. She only looked at me from the corner of her eyes, nothing exceeding such limits.
Yet, there it was! Finally, a normal reaction to my fading manners- she was starting to learn.
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A crime scene will follow this piece in the actual novel. So, do you think it's okay to have a quiet piece like this before the fighting scene starts in the next page?
