Ultimatum

Yes, the language at the end of the poem is Latin. If there's anyone who knows much about Latin, feel free to help me out. I just went online and kind of figured it out. The translation is "So is the ultimatum," so if there's anyone out there with access to legit Latin grammar, I would be very happy to have your pointers and corrections.

Okay. I'm o.o here to review. So first off, I gotta say I think you put a lot of work on this poem, like... you didn't sleep or eat three months just to finish it and make it look this... *can't find the word* amazing, awesome, cool, stunning, spectacular? WOW! The emotion in this poem stands out in shocking way. I'm just speachless.


Nitpicks:

Now, I notice you put periods, but your poem lacks commas. I think it should be punctuated like this:

EtCetera wrote:Be cursed, cruel world,
Suffer in thy despair.
Thine deeds have become-
Far too evil to repair.

I damn ye to the depths-
Of Hell's fiery lake,
Where thy evil mind can know-
The pain of true heartbreak.

The only fate I'll regret,
In not saving thee,
Is seeing the grieving tears-
Of the Man on the Tree.

EtCetera wrote:Proinde est ultimatum.

LATIN!

Great job, boy! This is awesome! Write more!

~Solvy <3

If you check out several of my poems, this not having commas issue has risen more than once. I absolutely despise commas in poetry, so don't take it personally when I don't change it. Thank you very much for the review, though. Oddly enough, I never knew how I felt about this poem.

Sometimes the absence of commas can hinder the flow rather than make it more evident, but for this poem that is not the case. I appreciate the deep cynical attitude and old-timey language used. The stanza where you hinted on sadness and regret stood out amidst the bitter tone in the rest of the poem. I look foward to reading more of your work. Bravo! PM me or post on my profile if you need anything

Some of this confused me a little but I'm still absolutely awe-struck. I really enjoyed this, the flow was great, the descriptions painted a clear and vivid picture in my mind, and the wording was terrific. Great job and good luck on your future writes.