I read it. To be honest, I don't think I'd be allowed by my parents to read this... maybe I'm sheltered or something, lol. In other words, this contained a lot more dirtiness than needed. Innuendo and such shouldn't be used to exemplify your characters, even if they are bad.
So, try piping this down a little bit, so kids like me won't feel like they're sneaking or anything
That said, it was once again great, and the conflict is finally beginning to peep through. My only "storyline-criticism" is a lack of background for the characters (i.e.- their family life, etc.)
