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Blue; ocean, endless like the sky that is your back-drop,
Your eyes glint with the happiness of faraway places, ice-cream, sun.
There are adults behind you, casually holding their drinks,
As if flaunting their age; faint fragments of their conversation linger,
But who cares what they're saying? Certainly not you.

Shrouded by innocence, you stand in your hardly-there bikini,
A vision of pool-side polka dots, hand on one hip,
A pose that a few years on would be provocative,
But you're cute, you get away with it.
Your other hand holds the remains of an ice-lolly,
I can see it's sticky rainbow trails snailing to the curve of your elbow,
And the bits where you've tried to lick it off.

Years later; curiosity has pulled a snag in that veil of innocence you wore so well,
And i can see how the phantom of a fist hugs your cheek,
The question of a kiss rests on your lip,
It drags the corners of your mouth upwards,
But leaves your eyes, your smile, behind.

Hmm, this was interesting and I'm not altogether sure I get the meaning, but it was kinda of cool.

Jubberr wrote:Blue; ocean, endless like the sky that is your back-drop, K, so this beginning was rather confusing. I get now that it is a pool, but the way you worded it was like "ehh, what?" Especially, the use of "back-drop"...that really threw me off. Maybe try, "A blue ocean, endless as the sky, falls behind you." Or something...
Your eyes glint with the happiness of faraway places, ice-cream, sun. So, happiness is faraway places, ice-cream, and sun? Cool.
There are adults behind you, casually holding their drinks,
As if flaunting their age; faint fragments of their conversation linger,
But who cares what they're saying? Certainly not you.

Shrouded by innocence, you stand in your hardly-there bikini,
A vision of pool-side polka dots, hand on one hip,
A pose that a few years on would be provocative, Try "later" in place of "on".
But you're cute, you get away with it.
Your other hand holds the remains of an ice-lolly,
I can see it's sticky rainbow trails snailing to the curve of your elbow,
And the bits where you've tried to lick it off.

Years later; curiosity has pulled a snag in that veil of innocence you wore so well#FF0040 ">.
#FF0040 ">I can see how the phantom of a fist hugs your cheek, Confusing/strangely worded. I had to read it twice.
The question of a kiss rests on your lip,
It drags the corners of your mouth upwards,
But leaves your eyes, your smile, behind. Hmm, this last bit was nicely worded.

So what exactly is meant by this piece? Is it supposed to be someone regretting the years gone by? That they are no longer young and innocent? That the years have worn and torn? That's kinda what I'm getting from this. Anyhow, whatever it means, it was pretty cute and I liked the carefree way you have it written. Good job!

Hiiii! I don't regret reading this but I've found it so full.. I see your point. And i wont talk about your views cuz i respect the emotions set in it. I connect to a lot of thoughts and it is most often a phase every lady has to step through and they are prominent though not accepted. I personally loved it. It just seemed like a lot into what could've been simple. But your use of imagery is brilliant. It was awesome.. Keep it going.

Thanks guys, I totally agree, I just never tried poetry before and i thought I would give it a go and see what people thought. (: