Swan Song (4)

Snoink · 2011-03-26T23:46:45Z

Dear Diary, The Black Swan is staying outside in the main plaza. In the day, he sleeps there and at night he roams around. Today, he flew away and I thought he would be gone, but he came back carrying logs on his back. He has been collecting logs all day. I don’t know why he is doing this. I am hiding from him. I hope he doesn’t find me. Eurodities says that Black Swans can hear heartbeats, so maybe he knows I am here since my heart is beating so fast, but he is pretending that I am not here. I hope he doesn’t plan to eat me. This house doesn’t have as much food in it as the other one, but at least it smells much better. There is not much water and I am very thirsty. There is a bucket in this house and a stream running outside the plaza. When the Black Swan goes for logs, I will go and pick up the water. I dare not go out otherwise. Maybe Eurodities will see the Black Swan here and realize that I am here as well. ~ Dear Diary, There is a big bonfire in the plaza now and it looks awfully warm. That’s why the Black Swan was collecting all those logs. Eurodities never liked bonfires because she said it was too bright and it blinded her, but the Black Swan doesn’t seem to mind. He is all stretched out and enjoying the warmth. Perhaps he will sleep. When he is sleeping, I shall take some of the fire and put it in the house. The Black Swan will know that I am here, but I think he knows that I am here anyway. Besides, it is so very cold in this house. It is warmer than outside, for there are many blankets, but it still feels very cold and I am shivering. It will be nice to have heat in this house. When I get the fire, I shall boil some water in a pot. I will make tea and porridge and it shall be delicious. I will also clean my face. My face is very dirty, but I am so cold that I do not want to wash it with the cold water. ~ Dear Diary, I took some fire when he was asleep, but when I brought it in the house, there were not enough logs to keep it going so it died. By that time, the Black Swan had woken up, so I was afraid to get more. He went into one of the houses and took a big kettle out and now he is cooking something. It smells delicious and I want to go out, but I am afraid. I don’t know why he is cooking something. Eurodities said that Black Swans don’t need to eat anything but souls, so I do not know why he would need to eat something warm. Perhaps he likes it. He is also digging a hole, though I don’t know why. I heard that Black Swans dig very fancy caverns, so maybe he is making a home here. He is digging really quickly though. He does not look very black any more. He looks brown from all the mud. I hope he doesn’t build his home here. I don’t know how I would ever get out. ~ Dear Diary, When I was sleeping, the Black Swan came into the house, but he didn’t do anything bad. Now there’s a nice roaring fire in the house and a kettle of boiling water over the fire. There was a big bowl of porridge too, but I ate it. At first, I didn’t want to because I thought it might be poisoned, but I was so hungry that I ate it anyway. It was really good and it warmed me right up. I don’t know how he got into the house because I locked it up, but maybe Black Swans can magically get into houses. Otherwise, they wouldn’t to be able to eat souls. I’m glad I ate it. Maybe he wants to be friends and that’s why he made the porridge for me. Maybe he is friends with Eurodities and that’s why he is being so nice to me. I think I will go out and meet him soon and see who he is. I don’t think he wants to harm me because he could have harmed me a long time ago. He is digging outside right now. I still don’t know why, but maybe I can help him. There is a shovel in this house and maybe I could go out and help him. But I am so tired and I do not feel well at all. ~ Dear Diary, I am sorry for not writing to you for a couple of days. I felt dizzy and I could not move at all without feeling sick. Once, when I had my eyes closed, the Black Swan came in because he thought I was asleep when I wasn’t. He had another bowl of porridge for me. He was about to leave, but I asked him to stay, so he did. He has been really kind to me. Because I couldn’t move, he washed my face and hands and took care of me. It feels really nice. He reminds me of Daddy a lot. I asked him questions, but he just nodded or shook his head for the answers. When I asked him if he could speak, he shook his head. I feel sorry for him. Maybe he is being so nice to me because he is so lonely. If I couldn’t speak, I would be lonely too. I found out why he was digging the hole. Today, he buried the mommy and the baby together and closed up the hole. He couldn’t speak, so he couldn’t do the funeral rites, but he found a book with the funeral rites in it and I read them. I don’t think I am supposed to do funeral rites, but there are no priests here so hopefully Diamea won’t mind. I also tried to sing a hymn, but I couldn’t and started crying. The Black Swan seemed really sad and he nuzzled my hand. Eurodities said that Black Swans are very cold, but he seemed really warm. I like it when he nuzzles my hand. We put white stones around the upturned dirt and I wrote with the stones, “Diamea Bless.” I hope Diamea will bless them. Maybe they are in paradise now. I hope they are. I wish I knew their names so I could put that on there too, but I don’t know. Maybe Diamea will know them when he sees them. I think the Black Swan is a very nice Swan. Right now, he is lying on my feet in bed. It is making me feel very warm and cozy. He reminds me a lot like Daddy except he cannot speak. I wish he could. I am sure he would have many nice stories. I’m sure he would tell better stories than Eurodities! I asked him if he knew Eurodities, and he nodded his head, but when I asked him if Eurodities had asked him to come here, he shook his head. I asked him if he knew Daddy and he nodded his head. Maybe Daddy told him to look for me. I wish I could ask him more questions! He seems really upset that he can’t answer them all, though I know he is only doing his best. I am really warm and comfortable, so I am going to go to bed. Goodnight, Diary! ~ Dear Diary, I asked the Black Swan if he wanted to bring me home to Daddy, and he nodded his head. So I shall be with Daddy soon! I am very excited. I wish I could ask him when. Right now, he seems to want to stay here, but I want to see Daddy right now. I miss him terribly! I want to see Granid as well. I’m sure he’ll be out of jail by now. I hope he isn’t hungry anymore! Being hungry isn’t fun. When I meet up with Granid again, I will be much nicer with him. I miss him and Daddy terribly and I feel bad for saying all those naughty things about him. I love Granid very much and I am glad he is my big brother. Sometimes, I think he is a bad big brother, but sometimes I am a bad little sister. Sometimes, we get into fights, but I am glad Daddy is there so we can make up and be friends again. I think I know why Daddy says that all great stories end with “and they lived happily ever after.” It’s because after they go through so many difficulties that they realize how important it is to treat people kindly. I think I will be very happy when I go back to Daddy and Granid. I am glad that I am going back home soon. I am ready. ~ Dear Diary, The Black Swan is still taking care of me. I am feeling better, though I get tired easily, and I think the Black Swan wants me to get better before we go to Daddy. I shall try to get better quickly! I was reading through my old writings and I realized I hadn’t finished the story of the bastard princess, so I will do that now. Now, when the queen realized that she was with child, she grew very heartsick, for she knew that her child would have to be second in line to this bastard child and it made her very mad. So, when the bastard princess came to live in the castle with them, a little girl who was only five years old, the queen did her best to make the child look very foolish so that everybody laughed at her. It was easy to laugh at the bastard princess because she looked so very awkward. She had dull brown hair and murky blue eyes that sometimes changed to green. While she wasn’t ugly, she wasn’t pretty, so she blended in entirely too easily with the rest of the common little girls. The princess was very sad about this, because she was very lost and lonely in this new castle. She only wanted new friends, however everybody laughed at her. So, after much searching, she found out that the royal horseman didn’t laugh at her questions and she could be honest and happy with him. Everybody laughed at her still because she smelled like horses, but she didn’t mind because they were not kind to her and only the horseman was kind to her. So, she resolved to stay there and learn how to care for horses, under the instruction of the royal horseman. In the meantime, the queen raised her own little child, the true princess, and the whole kingdom was smitten with the baby. While they laughed at the little bastard princess, they loved the queen’s baby and claimed that the baby was the true heir of the kingdom. After all, the true princess was beautiful with hair that gleamed like a Black Swan’s feather and with eyes so blue that they sparkled like sapphires. This, they said, was what a true heir should look like. The queen was hopeful that the king would listen to his people and decide that the bastard princess was not fit to rule and that her daughter, the true princess, should also be the true queen. But the king refused, saying that Diamea had decreed that the eldest offspring of the king must be the heir to the throne, so it was impossible to change that. So the queen decided that something else should be done. She gathered all the high priests and seers and told them to see if anything bad would happen if her daughter took the throne. She told them, if their prophecies were particularly good, she would reward them handsomely with money. The priests and the seers were very greedy, so they took her money and foretold that nothing bad would happen if the true princess took over. They said that because the bastard princess was a bastard, she wasn’t really the true heir and that if she were to take the throne the kingdom would dissolve into anarchy. This news troubled the king greatly, for it had been foretold to his fathers that every firstborn of the king’s should become the next ruler. Because the bastard princess was so young, he didn’t want to scare her with his presence, since he knew he could be very imposing to her, but he brought her in anyway because he wanted to speak to her. He told her about the prophecy and that she was destined to become the new queen. But when the child heard this, she remained impassive. When the king had finished with the story, the princess thanked him very much for telling her of this story, but she informed him that she did not want to be queen. Incredulous, the king asked her what she wanted to do instead. The little girl answered, “Tame horses.” This made the king laugh very hard and he gave her a great big kingly hug. He said that he loved horses too and that ruling a kingdom was very much like taming horses and if she, a young girl like herself, wanted to tame horses, she would absolutely love running a kingdom. This gladdened the bastard princess’s heart very much, so she gave the king a big kiss on the cheek and promised that when he was ready for her to rule, she would be very happy to take over for him. This made the king very happy, so the next day, he proclaimed that the prophecy that had been foretold many years ago was still true and that he would keep to that prophecy as it was foretold and not how it was reinterpreted. The queen was devastated, of course, but she raised her daughter carefully as if she would be queen anyway, teaching her daughter the ways of the military and showing her how to act in a very political world, even as the king kept the firstborn with him and taught her firsthand the many things she would need to know when ruling a country. Now, it happened that when the bastard princess was eight years old, a strange vision came to her. She was bathing alone one day when a beautiful woman rose out of the water and kissed her cheek. The woman was wearing no clothes and her skin seemed to shimmer like fish scales. She had murky blue eyes which flashed green and she had long beautiful fingers which fluttered like fins. When the bastard princess saw her, she scurried out of the water and fell to her knees and begged forgiveness for taking a bath without permission, for she knew that what she saw was a water nymph and that water nymphs always wanted to be asked for permission before their water was used. However, the nymph waved her hands away. “Peace be with you!” the nymph cried out, bowing. “Rise up, my daughter, for we have much to talk about and time is fleeing away. A Potential has been born today and the heavens cry out in pain for it has been foretold that the Separation is coming! Death shall shake this world and what is White shall become Black and what is Alive shall become Dead.” The princess was very frightened by this, and she asked the nymph what she meant. So the nymph bowed once more. “Peace, time is fleeing and I do not know the answers. But soon, Diamea shall come and eat among you. You must accept him in your house and let him eat whatever he desires. Then he shall speak to you and you must do whatever he says. Otherwise, what is Dead shall remain Dead until the Immortal is allowed to die.” The nymph kissed the princess and said, “My blessings for you. May you see with a clean heart and open mind untainted by what the world says. May Diamea guide and protect you throughout your journey.” And with that, the water nymph disappeared into the water. The princess was very afraid, but she put on her clothes and told her father what had happened. Her father was very much alarmed, but he was a very wise man. He said, “If Diamea intends to visit us, we must accept his visit with grace. Let us open our house and greet those who wish to come eat with us with kindness, for we have so much to give.” And so every night, fifty people were allowed to come in and dine with the king’s family. The queen was very much distressed at this, but she was excited for Diamea to come, so she agreed with the inconveniences for she wanted to speak to Diamea very much. She hoped that Diamea would bless her daughter so that her daughter would be fit to rule the kingdom. So, every dinner, she would watch the guests eagerly, hoping that they were Diamea. While she was not certain what Diamea would look like she guessed he would be very impressive. At first, she was very hopeful that he would come right away, but years passed and nobody stood up and claimed to be Diamea. So she met with the king and very quietly said, “King, I know you are waiting for the Diamea to come with a heavy heart, and I confess to feel the same heaviness in my heart.” The king, though sad to hear that her heart was weighed down with this, embraced her and gave her a deep kiss. “Do not be afraid,” he said, “For even in trouble, Diamea brings hope and peace to all.” The queen said, “King, but that is what troubles me. How do we know that a water nymph spoke to your daughter and told her these things? I am not saying that she is lying, for I do not believe she would lie about such a great issue. But what if the nymph was lying to her? Or maybe the nymph was not really nymph but an evil sprit in disguise? What if this spirit is trying to delude her senses? Diamea has not come and it has been five years. How do we know that Diamea will come?” The king was very much worried by her words, for he had thought of the same thing. “We must be patient, as Diamea has commanded us to be patient,” he said to the queen. “For, when he inflicted the world with Black Swans, he soon gave us White Swans so that our souls would not be destroyed, for he loved us that much. He will not allow to be destroyed.” But the seed of doubt had been placed deep within his heart and even when he said this, he despaired within, for those that do not trust in Diamea fully despair many times over before they are allowed to die. Now, several more years passed and the princesses became like adults. The bastard princess was very passionate and fierce while her younger sister was very quiet and introverted. They were very different and while the king loved both, he especially loved his eldest daughter and secretly triumphed that she would be queen when he was gone. He was getting very old and he knew he would die soon, so he wanted to talk with his daughters in private about what the future would be like and how they were supposed to help each other out in the future. At breakfast time, he gathered them together in a small sitting room and they were about to eat and talk privately, when all of the sudden, a large crash resounded out and a man stumbled through the window pane. He was covered in blood from the broken glass, but he was so drunk that he didn’t appear to notice anything. He gave a quick bow to the king and the daughters, eying the oldest daughter and whistling loudly. The king was very upset about this and was about to kick him out, but his oldest daughter stopped him, saying, “Though he is a troublesome spirit, we must show him kindness, for even he may be Diamea.” The king highly doubted this, but he relented anyway for he loved his oldest daughter. So he said to the man, “In Diamea’s name, you shall be healed and provided for.” The man laughed and tottered around the room. “Healed? I don’t need any healing. And Diamea can go curl up and die, as far as I’m concerned. He hasn’t done anything for me!” Then he glared at the king. “Well? You said I would be provided for. Where’s my drink?” The king was highly shocked, so he didn’t say anything, but his younger daughter suggested timidly, “I don’t think you need anything more to drink.” The man, enraged, flung a chair to a wall. “I said, I need a drink!” He turned to the bastard princess. “Well, are you going to just stand there or are you going to get me anything?” The bastard princess was very much afraid, but she went obediently to the liquor cabinet and took out a bottle of the cheapest liquor they had. She pulled out a glass, but he just took the bottle and drank in one stroke. Then he raided the cabinet and took out the most expensive liquor and drank that too. Satisfied, he went to the couch, threw his arm over the youngest daughter and smiled. “You’re a cute one, but you’re not that cute. I don’t know why you even think you have a chance with him. But I suppose that won’t matter, will it?” And then he rested his head in her lap and fell asleep. The king watched, enraged, and when he realized that the man was fast asleep, he stood up and turned to his oldest daughter, fuming. “How dare you invite such a man in for breakfast!” he yelled to her. “If it weren’t for him and his drinks, he might have raped you!” The oldest daughter was very embarrassed and said, “He may have been the Diamea.” “If he were the Diamea, then I say that I hope the Diamea gets knocked out of power soon! He is a scoundrel and he could have hurt both of you two. And now he wants to get cozy with you.” He grabbed the man by the scruff of his neck and pulled him off his youngest daughter. The man woke up blearily. The king threw him to the wall and pointed to the broken window. “Get back where you came from, vermin, or I shall personally execute you myself!” The man smiled at this threat. “Personally executed by the king! What an honor. But, your daughter is right. What if I am the Diamea?” He stood up and smiled. “You cannot know, not for sure, for Diamea can come in many forms. What if this form of his is a drunken man that he has chosen this time?” “I doubt you are the Diamea, sir, and if you are, then you are a disgrace and I ashamed to worship you,” the king hissed. The man smiled. “And you, bastard. What say you?” The princess’s cheeks turned red at this name, for she hadn’t been called this to her face for a very long time, and she gave a low bow. “If you are Diamea,” she said, “then I am bound to worship you. And although you may give me pain now, I will trust in you to deliver me from pain into glory, as is your promise which you sealed with your love.” “Do you think I am Diamea?” “It doesn’t matter to me.” “Then you are a weakling for you will worship anything without knowing the truth.” He grabbed her chin and thrust it so that she had to look at his face. “Do you think that I am the Diamea?” She closed her eyes tightly, for she couldn’t stand the smell of him. “No, sir.” “Why do you say that?” “Because I don’t think Diamea could be so cruel.” He smiled and let her go. “Diamea, the one who brought in the Black Swans to eat the souls of humans? You expect him to be kind?” The bastard princess lowered her eyes humbly. “He did that because he saw the world dissolve into wildness and he wanted to teach us that there was dignity in our souls. That is why he created the White Swans, so that our souls would not fall into despair.” “Then why would Diamea allow those same souls to die into nothingness?” “He did that so that we would appreciate what little we have all the more, for we have nothing but a blink of an eye and we must keep wide awake and alert, always.” “Then listen to me! I am paving a way and destroying death. You must not be afraid. The world shall collapse and you shall collapse with it, but you shall not be destroyed. I am telling you this so that you may know and not despair even at the last moment, for you shall always remain in my heart. But keep wide awake and alert, always. When I come back, I shall be victorious, but you will not know me just as you do not know me now. But do not despair, for you shall be in my heart, even then.” That is not the whole story, but I shall tell the rest later. I am very sleepy now. ~ Dear Diary, The Black Swan hopped outside, and I think he wants me to follow him. I think we’re going to Daddy!

GryphonFledgling

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Tue May 24, 2011 12:25 am

GryphonFledgling says... · Tue May 24, 2011 12:25 am

Yay for more of the Bastard Princess story!

Seconding Jabs in that it sounds very mature here. I mean, the other part did too, but I noticed it more here, maybe because it was longer and that much more involved. While I know that kids can remember remarkable amounts and specifics of their favorite stories, this seemed a bit much. It is still a marvelous story and I love the style in which it is written, but for the context of how it is being told, it felt... off.

Also, again with the rape reference in the story. Does Solea wonder about it at all? And it seems a bit graphic and blunt for a fairy-tale. I know a lot of fairy-tales that we are exposed to now have been sanitized many times over the years, but even in the first half of the story we had, instead of saying that the king and queen had sex, it is just that they "laid" together. Sort of that specific sense of "he knew his wife" that we find in the Bible and stuff. And then here, all of a sudden we are getting really specific. Why not "he could have had his way with you" or something? I know it's nitpicky, but it bothers me just a bit in terms of consistency and Solea's understanding of the world.

A bit nitpicky too, but for the first half or so of just Solea's entries, she really didn't use a lot of contractions and she tended to use "shall" quite a bit. It made her sound so much more formal than in previous bits and it was a bit distracting. I know we all keep harping on this voice, but it's just kind of a bit part of the story.

I loved the Black Swan and all of her speculations on him and his treatment of her and everything. It was all just so heartwarming.

I'm hooked. I really am. I have no idea why it took me so long to get around to reading this. *headdesk*

~GryphonFledgling

I am reminded of the babe by you.

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Alliaaryn5665

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Sat Jun 25, 2011 1:44 pm

Alliaaryn5665 says... · Sat Jun 25, 2011 1:44 pm

Hi,

AHHHHHHH! MUST KEEP READING!! The poor baby girl! Solea has captured my heart! I worry every second if she is going to be okay. She almost seems real, but you can definately tell how fictional she is, and not just because she is in a story. The story of the bastard princess is good too. Sometimes, though, I feel as if you should have made it a seperate yet connected thing with Swan Song. Like, a "Before it all" piece. There were a few run-on sentences and grammar mistakes. Along with spelling, too! Eyeing, not eying.

The queen was devastated, of course, but she raised her daughter carefully as if she would be queen anyway, teaching her daughter the ways of the military and showing her how to act in a very political world, even as the king kept the firstborn with him and taught her firsthand the many things she would need to know when ruling a country.

That seriously is in dire need of rewording os something. It doesn't really fit nor flow.
I also, personally, don't like how most of this was an almost entirely different story. I like it. All of it.

Farewell,
A.

You think you are any different from me,or yourfriends?Or this tree?If you listenhard enough,you canhear every living thingbreathing together.You canfeel everything growing.We are all living togethereven if most folksdon't act like it.We all havethe same roots,and we are allbranches of the sametree.

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RacheDrache

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Mon Jun 27, 2011 4:23 am

RacheDrache says... · Mon Jun 27, 2011 4:23 am

Snoinkus.... je suis... back. Don't know "back" in French yet. Sigh.

Anyway, I chowed through the first entries here. Absolutely chowed. Chowed and was relieved that Solea was back in good hands!

My advance knowledge is hindering me again here...

I guess my main thing is the part with the bastard princess, because I didn't chew through that. It had too much dialogue and in-scene stuff for it to seem like a fairytale. Also, the length and amount of detail in it.... Possibly, if Solea has it memorized verbatim? That could work. Or, if you could simplify it down into something more fairytale esque (and cut out the finer layers of plot that she tells,) then it would definitely work better, methinks. As it is now, that's a huge amount of writing for a girl to do in one sitting, so maybe you could split it up at the very least, create some suspense that way with it so that we're following two stories instead of one with the occasional visit from another?

Overall, though, I continue to admire the brilliance of this.. and the brilliance of how it relates to what is to come. It's making my evening. It's making me want to go review. It's making me want to go read and write. Good fantasy... it does exist these days! It does! It really does!

*supreme happiness*

Rach

I don't fangirl. I fandragon.

Have you thanked a teacher lately? You should. Their bladder control alone is legend.

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