Wonderful Rain

Why is it that suddenly,
When I think I'm pretty under,
When skies aren't blue,
And clouds are gray,
And giving way to thunder,
I can think of you,
No,
Think of us,
And always feel better?
Well,
My dear,
I think it's because,
I don't mind getting wetter.

(feedback is appreciated... nope, actually feedback is required! Mwah ha ha ha, Mwah ha ha ha! So happy today!)

Spoiler

Oh my gosh! All of a sudden I realize there are 10 comments on this! Thank you everyone! Now, I noticed that a lot of people didn't really get it, which is okay because I suppose it could be pretty confusing (not to me seeing as how I wrote it). Um, I guess what I was tryingt o say was that there's this guy and I can be really, really, really sad, but if I think about him being with me, then I'd feel better, even if it's a chance that it'd make me feel worse in the long run (wetter from more rain which equals sadness) wow, that is confusing, sorry 'bout that guys. Thanks again for all of the... comments and such. I feel so special now =]

I'm just going to re-write it and explain as I go.

Why is it that suddenly, The word random is misused here. I think suddenly sounds better until you find another word.
When I am pretty under, Hardly changed, but it's now 7 syllables, the same as the first line.
When skies aren't blue,
And clouds are gray, These could be switched around, as it seems like the clouds, and not the skies, are giving way to thunder.
And giving way to thunder, Away is not used correctly in this context.
I can think of you, no, think
of us, and feel better?
Well, my dear, it's because
I don't mind getting wetter. These few lines have been rearranged and slightly changed so they have matching number of syllables.

I hope my feedback helps you!

EDIT: To me, this poem is about how when you feel down, you think about a certain person who makes you happy. But you would also like to think of you two together (as in a relationship). I think that is where the "I don't mind getting wetter" comes from. You don't mind taking a risk, and hoping you can be together is a risk as you might get heart-broken.

I could be totally wrong, but that's the meaning I got after reading it a few times.

I really like this poem! I thought the last line was very an interesting metaphor. I really love poems and I look forward to seeing more from you! Great Job!
-Bookcutie

I really like this poem! I especially love the last line. It's so cute and sad at the same time. I don't want to go too deep because I hate being the nitpicky one. So I just wanted to comment say I really enjoyed it.

Hey there,
I am Gaga for the rain so I like this poem. But it's not only because I'm naturally enamored with anything that has to do with rain that I like this poem, it's the simplicity and blank verse really always excites me. Hearing someone's thoughts is interesting. Anyway, just fix the few things LittleLuciano mentioned and it will be grand.
xxx Upile xxx

i love it. But I sort of didn't get it. But I loved it.

Heard Singing in the Rain?

Love the poem. And I really like the last line...except I don't get it...Why is that the reason that thinking of this relationship makes you feel better?

"Why do I feel better when I think about you, even though it's raining? Because I don't mind getting wet!!"

???

Isn't the idea that you don't mind getting wetter because you think of this person, not vice versa?

Certainly keep the better/wetter rhyme. It's adorable. I love it when more than a syllable rhymes perfectly, like in Dr. Seuss. But if, as I suspect, you are trying to say that thinking of your special friend makes you feel better, maybe change the wording a little.

Keep absolutely everything else. It's so cute!

Mrs.E.D.

BTW Noticing your location: Fred Astaire is the best. If I wasn't already married to Mr. Darcy I would marry Fred.

It was good and reminded me of love.I am geussing someone had a goodday?
I think you should add maybe something like "and its days like this that make me remember or everyday I wonder if you remember." Good poem and very heart felt.

love helped the blind see the sun and the mute sing and love smiles ~dreamer~

It was good and reminded me of love.I am geussing someone had a goodday?
I think you should add maybe something like "and its days like this that make me remember or everyday I wonder if you remember." Good poem and very heart felt.

love helped the blind see the sun and the mute sing and love smiles ~dreamer~

Hello iheartbooks,
This is a great poem. I liked the last couple of lines the best. Thats all I really have to say. Keep writing!

I Love this poem <3