(First and foremost, I apologize for the length. If you do not read the full thing in one sitting, I don't blame you, but I at least recommend that you read the first 3 parts, take a break, then the next part, then the last. Thank you, and enjoy reading)
getsuyōbi
The air...it has a stillness to it. The trees seem lifeless to me; perhaps I am lifeless to them. I look at the scrap of paper in my hand one last time, I look at the writing; Atsuko has excellent penmanship; and after looking at it, I open the doors to the dojo, for what might be my final time. As I step inside, a good friend of mine, Kazue, offers me a cup of my favorite tea. I decline. Might as well die on an empty stomache.
The Atsuko dojo contains many pupils who, to say the least, are very hard to read. Some might appear worried, for me or Atsuko, I cannot tell. But others have looks of scorn, as if I am treading on their territory. Atsuko comes through the door and enters the room where I waited. We have not seen each other in such a long time, I nearly forgot what his voice sounded like. He welcomes me into this remarkable dojo of his; it has really improved since last I've been here. But almost immediately after his welcoming words, he asks if we can step outside and speak, which I agree to.
What a shame. Such beautiful days should not be spent like this.
"As you know, the country is changing." says Atsuko, rather grimly.
I say nothing.
"Am I so wrong about that?" he says, a sound of desperation in his voice.
"No, you are not wrong...far from it, in fact. With every passing day, the country we know and love falls apart. You are right about that. But what you are wrong about, is whether we can change what is happening." I say with seriousness in my voice.
"I am telling you," Atsuko says with similar desperation as earlier, "that we can change things. This is not some act of heroism on my part; we will very likely both die saving our country, but I do not do it for recognition. I assure you that. Now, I have gathered a team of able-minded men who will prove very capable for the task at hand."
"Those men inside there?" I say, gesturing to the dojo, "I do not trust them. They would only set me back, and set you back as well. I can already tell you have no idea what you're doing here."
Atsuko sighs, and then speaks, "Meet me here tomorrow at midday. I will expect your final answer. This is your final chance; I can only hope you come to your senses and join me. Farewell."
He walks away, and I walk off shortly.
I do not have anywhere to stay tonight, so I will sleep under a nearby bridge. After finding a good place to sleep, I lay down, and drift off.
I had better take my sword when I meet with Atsuko tomorrow.
kayōbi
It is midday of the day that my fate may be decided forever. I have thought long and hard this morning about my decision. It is ironic...when I first read his letter to me, I almost immediately decided against joining him. And yet today, I am no so sure. The only thing that can be done now is act wise and make a decision that I will not regret.
I am at the same place we met yesterday. The weather is acting up a bit, getting a little windy, but that is no problem. Atsuko comes, and we talk.
"Have you reached a decision, my friend?" says he.
"I have."
I clutch at the sword at my side.
"Well? Will you join me or will you not?"
"Atsuko, you are a madman. NOTHING, will be accomplished through your actions. I cannot join you. You have been a great friend to me before, but now you will only attempt the impossible"
"I...I don't know what to say. Yes, it might be a suicide mission. But I intend on doing this for PRIDE, goddammit! Can you not understand that? The age of the samurai is dying! Every single day, our former allies and friends are corrupted by the f*cking government! I have lost all of my patience for you! I can stand it no longer! Get out of my sight...and never show your face around here again..."
"Atsuko, I did not come here today to try and stop you from your dreams, you know I wouldn't do that. But the times have changed, and along with them, so have I. I am sorry that-"
"LEAVE!"
I flinch a little. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Kazue spying on us, trying to hide...
"-I am sorry that we cannot be men about this, and disagree. So I do not come here today to talk you out of this; that is no longer an option. You must be stopped, by force if need be. Draw your sword, and prepare yourself!"
I draw my sword and lunge at him with an overhead strike. He dodges so that I only hit his shoulder.
"You fool..." says Atsuko, "You are no longer the swordsman you have been before. You do not have a chance in HELL of defeating me, and those words will be your last."
He draws his sword and goes for my left side. He might have slashed into my rib if I hadn't leaped out of the way.
We circle each other. Neither of us are accustomed to brash tactics and striking first. After what might have been a few minutes, Atsuko leaps into the air and comes down with a viscous strike aimed towards my head, but I block and jump back. He land, and I slash at his right side, making a deep wound. He falls to the ground and grasps his wound. I walk up to where he lay.
"If I had given my all," I say, "you would be dead. Be thankful for my kindness."
"The biggest mistake you will make, is giving me sympathy..."
He takes out a concealed blade and slashes me across the stomach and chest, leaving a gashing wound.
"When will you learn..." I say before beheading him.
Atsuko is dead now, but I am left with a wound that cannot be healed...This is to be expected, and I accept my punishment.
But if I wish to redeem myself, for my actions so long ago...I must seek help.
The people of the city give me strange looks as I walk through the streets, still bleeding, although bleeding in increasingly less amounts.
The blood runs very red...the reddest blood I've ever seen. At times I think "Is this my blood? Am I done?"
I begin to think about what makes the people of this city tick; they are protected by the government, or so they think. No, no, I can't be thinking like this...the government will protect them, and I am doing my part to contribute. Although the government certainly hasn't helped before...But what if all Atsuko really-
I see black.
suiyōbi
I awake in a bed which is not familiar...where am I? The room is certainly nice and welcoming.
A woman comes through the door, and introduces herself as Mizuki. She asks what my name is, and I say Jun.
"Well, Jun, you fainted in the street, and I was passing by. You have some rather...serious wounds. We need to get you to a doctor, right away.
"No...I accept death...I do not want your sympathy, I do not need it. I thank you greatly for treating my wounds, but I really must be on my way."
"You are not going anywhere! Listen, you are going to DIE, if we do not find a doctor. Do you understand? So please, be cooperative. The sooner we can get in touch with a doctor, the better."
"I have...nothing to live for any more...you should have just left me to die..."
"Do not say that! Every single person has something to live for, do you hear me?"
"You are young...the world...has been kind to you, but you will...learn. I will stay here, and cooperate. I do not wish to disturb you by dying. Now go! Fetch the doctor, if you wish. The sooner, the better, you say."
She leaves the room, as well as the residence itself. As soon as she leaves, I jump out of the bed and get my things. With my gear, I leave the house, and I can't help but feel a bit guilty whilst doing it.
I must travel...travel to the dojo where I have trained. Then...only then, can I set things right.
I do not have much food, but I will get by and persist.
I get out my map, and head off to the North, to where the Yuu dojo is. There...I will redeem myself.
The first leg of my journey should be a smooth one, with clear weather expected for the duration of the day. But after that...I do not know. And I do not know where I will stay tonight, but I will face that problem when it comes.
As I travel, memories come flooding back. Will the people of the Yuu dojo still remember me? Will they welcome me or treat me with hostility? After I abandoned them so many years ago...I do not know. The fires of that day...still haunt me.
It begins to rain, but only lightly at first. I find a small cave opening just in time, right when the downpour really begins.
I start a fire to warm myself, but I put it out almost immediately. It brings back too many memories. Guess I'll be cold tonight.
I still have the letter from Atsuko, luckily it didn't get ruined in the rain. Well, I don't have the entire letter. I ripped parts of it to shreds after reading it once, but most of it is intact. The bit that is fully intact reads:
and I know that you might still have your regrets from that day. I do as well. But I am asking you to put that aside. I ask you to come to my dojo. The details are on the back of this letter. We are able men, and we can do this. The government must be stopped NOW, before any more can-
And it cuts off there. Tomorrow, I expect to reach the Yuu dojo, and my redemption can truly begin. But for now, I will sleep.
mokuyōbi
It is still raining...but when I wake up, I see a figure in the rain...
Kazue.
I jump up and immediately draw my blade, and assume a defensive position. Without my wounds, I could have done this in less than a second, but now it takes me far longer. It even hurts a little.
"Stand up, old man." Kazue says with arrogance in his voice.
"You will learn to respect your elders. Sit."
He unloads his things and takes a seat.
"I saw you...I saw you do everything. You killed my master, Atsuko."
"Kazue, we haven't known each other for long, but long enough that I know you are a reasonable person."
He is silent
I continue "Cut me down. Avenge your master, and give me a samurai's death. I will fight you, I must give you that at least, but I know I will lose..."
"I do not come for vengeance...I know why you murdered my master, and to be honest, I do not blame you." He pauses, as to let both of us take it in.
"I come with a warning. Yesterday, I traveled to Niigata, assuming you would head there. Atsuko told me something of your...interactions with him in the past. At the time of his murder, all I wanted was vengeance...so I headed to Niigata to find you, and kill you. But instead what I found...was a woman. Fairly young, but I could tell she is skilled with a blade."
"I come with the warning, that this woman is going to kill you. You might know this already...but she told me of how she longed to see you. At first...at first, she wished to learn from you. But as time passed, the admiration turned into a hatred...I'm not going to tell you how to act upon this, but this woman is out for blood. She can kill you if she wants...I believe I know why you killed Atsuko in the first place. I understand. This woman is out for blood, which is far worse than the vengeance I could wish to enact...So I don't wish good or bad luck to either you or the girl...but fate will have it's way."
And with that, he leaves. There is no need for me to say a word to him...I cannot look him in the eyes, with my shame.
My wound is no better than before...there's no need to treat it further. After eating breakfast, I head out, and toward the town of my birth...
Niigata.
On my way, I notice the little things in life. The birds...the grass and sky, the travelers, each with more than their fair share of stories. Some notice the wound...others clearly are too busy. But while the wound may not exist to them, it is very real to me...it will force me to face my destiny.
But all this while, I can't stop thinking about Kazue's warning...If the woman is who I think she is, then things may not go as well as planned...but that's destiny for you.
So deep in thought, I would have missed the town entirely if it wasn't so familiar...
Niigata.
The town is in ruins even all these years later...And I doubt there is anything I can do to help...No, nothing can be done. My redemption is separate.
It isn't difficult to find the dojo which is my destination...the Yuu dojo. It is in surprisingly good shape. A woman welcomes me. I do not ask for her name; I am certain. She is not so surprised, and asks:
"Yuu? How many years has it been?"
"It has certainly been long, Ayame..."
I hoped she could forgive me. I was wrong.
She draws her sword and threatens me. "Leave this place at once. I do this for your own good, Yuu, although it might not seem like it. The people in this town...they want vengeance. They have waited many years for you to return. Leave, or I will let them know that you are here, and you will be murdered."
"Ayame, I know what I have done is wrong...but look at this wound...I am dying, Ayame. I need to redeem myself. And I need YOU, for that. I ask that you can put my sins behind us and forgive me, so that true recovery can be made, on both of our parts."
It is ironic. Atsuko said something similar. Right before I killed him. Will I be treated with the same fate?
"Come inside, and close the door." she says. "Have a seat. You have 10 minutes of my time and then I want you out."
The wound starts tugging at me.
I start. "On that day, so long ago...me and Atsuko were out training, and whilst we were out...we came across a camp of brigands and thieves. We have never been wealthy, and you knew at the time my father was ill...we had to steal from them. It is only stealing from thieves, and for a good cause. Now, the consequences were dire...I know that all too well now..."
I can feel my wound begging me to treat it.
I glance at her and see a tear forming in her eye, and I continue. "After stealing, we had ran away, and we had not been caught. We went on with our training. We came back later that day to find my father...arguing with the brigands, the very thieves we stole from. They had said that some of their goods were missing, and requested knowledge of who had been in that area during the day. My father...he knew it was me and Atsuko. We were the only ones that had gone...Yet he knew he was ill, and did not want to lose his only son, the only person that could carry on the legacy of the dojo. He offered himself to the bandits, and my father...was murdered right in front of me."
The wound is screaming now.
Her tears are becoming more profuse, but I am running out of time, so I must continue. "Afterwards, it was argued whether I would inherit the dojo or not...and I declined. I was still in shock, and did not even want to live at the moment. You know the rest. I offered a a challenge to whoever would take it: the requirement, to defeat me in a duel; the prize, inheritance of the dojo. During those tough times, people sympathized with me, and nobody would take on the challenge. Well, you were the only one who would...and I commend you for that. We dueled, and even though you lost, I gave you rights to the dojo anyway. And I can still here your desperate pleas even today...'COME BACK! GODDAMMIT! I DO NOT DESERVE THIS! I DID NOT WIN!'...That night, the bandits attacked again, and me and Atsuko had already ran away. We had to get away from it all...The townspeople looked to you for help, and you tried your best, but the damage was done by then...and nearly the entire town was burnt to the ground."
The wound puts me in pain, as punishment for not answering it's call.
I take a pause. The time is up now. She draws her sword, and says, "Fight me. Right here, right now."
"I am seriously wounded Ayame...I cannot fight in my condition"
"Then why would you show your face around here again? Get out of my sight!"
"I came...to apologize. I will be on my way now."
"Wait a minute...by the look of your wound, you will die tomorrow. Hmph. Serves you right. Now GET OUT."
I leave, and find an abandoned place to stay at for the night. Might as well make myself comfortable. It will be the final time I ever sleep in a bed to wake up, after all.
kin'yōbi
I awake to hear strange sounds. It is still dark. Someone...someone is here...
Someone is in the house.
I roll out of the bed and grab my blade. I draw it, get up, and ask, loudly:
"Who is there?"
"..."
Ayame.
In my days as an assassin, I have killed many people during the night. But seldom have I defended against a nightly intruder. I crouch down and reach for a torch; once lit, I throw it out to where the voice came from. It is sliced in half. She has improved greatly over the years.
I run out the house through an opening in the wall and she gives chase. Now that we are out in the open, the fight will be more manageable. I begin to wonder where she is until she appears almost right in front of me.
"Fight me." she says.
"You do not deserve to die..."
"Don't you get it? You talk about redemption but have you ever thought about the redemption of others? I need this...If I die, at least it will be as a warrior."
She lunges at me but her blow is easily dodged, even in my state. But I do not counter; I will not kill her.
"I will give you a wound greater than the one you have already!" shouted Ayame.
"Atsuko....Atsuko gave me this wound."
"What?" she said in between breaths.
"I killed Atsuko. I had to stop him...he had plans to conquer the entire country, and ruin the peace which people have striven to attain."
I expected a cry. Instead, Ayame simply said "So that is why the man...Kazue, he said his name was...came looking for you. I am grateful to him for letting me kill you, for I know this is my destiny!"
I sheathed my blade and say "Ayame. You are still very young. You cannot throw your life away by fighting me. I will not kill you, but even killing me will not resolve which has happened. You of all people, an idealist, should know that by now. I am sorry." I walk away.
All her excitement turns to silence...Have my words really affected her so much?
"Just...go. You don't deserve a warrior's death. You deserve exactly what you're getting. I'll take care of the dojo...I can promise you that. But I just want you dead...now matter how, so leave...and burn in hell."
The fires of hell don't sound too bad. Not much worse than the fires of the day my fate was changed.
And even today, I do not change my fate. I merely accept now.
I walk through the city, my wound tearing me to pieces. The sun is rising...As it rises, I set.
I make it to an acquaintance's house...no, no. He is not an acquaintance. He is a friend, or at least, he was.
The wound screams, and I fall to the ground. I start crawling, and make it to the back wall, the tallest wall standing.
The light is fading...
The wound screeches, and as soon as I had gotten to kneeling, I am back at crawling. I search through the debris from the fire...and I come across a picture.
The light is fading...
I have lost Ayame's smile, Kazue's look of admiration, and Atsuko's serious yet playful look.
And in this painting...this small, cheap painting...I can remember at least the look of Atsuko, as well as my own.
The light is fading...
Once best friends, we have parted ways. But now, I can die in peace, knowing that deep down, we are still bonded by the links of fate.
My world turns black.
