The Victim

Night falls and the sky covers the surroundings in a blanket of ice cold snow. I find the last three words a little odd. Snow and ice are too closely associated for 'ice' to describe 'snow'... I turn and I feel a sharp pain burst through my chest, then my body falls to the ground. A stranger stands towering above me, masked by the darkness. Yet I see a haunting dull smile reflect from their form. They kneel. Wait, wait, wait. How does a smile reflect from a form? The word choice could be different. Then the pain I feel grows as the weapon is plunged deeper and twisted to produce the flowing red liquid of blood, 'The flowing red liquid of blood' is odd. It is a given that blood is liquid and liquid flows. Maybe the flowing red stream of blood? which pours like a river to the ground. I try to scream but a deep gurgle is the only noise produced and more blood foams from my mouth. Blood... foams?

"Beautiful eyes, beautiful eyes. Taken," my attacker moans,"Now to dull the pain."

My face is next to feel the unbarable brute force strength of the being above me. This sentence just sounds awkward. Maybe 'My face is the next target of the unbearable brute force of the being above me.' That's a bit awkward too, though. Play around with it. I feel my nose shatters and my lip bursts. My face begins to crumble. Your face would not crumble. How about 'The bones in my face begin to crumble.' I find it harder to breathe. The punches continue. Swelling takes over my vision.

"You're. Killing. Me," I manage to force out, which freezes my assailant.

"You killed her." A husky croak is admitted. I don't think admitted is the right word here. Do you mean 'emitted'? "I saw her walk to you. She wanted directions. You stabbed her. Stole her bag. Ran. You killed her."

In a blurred array of colours a flicker of my memory returns and I recall the earlier events of this evening. I was starving. I was craving. I needed to feed my habit. Then I saw a lone woman walk towards me. She had short, fair, hair and was wearing a deep navy dress. Her lips were crimson and so were her shoes. My mind was all over the place when she spoke to me. I didn't hear her words, I was focused on the black handbag resting on her shoulder. Before I knew what was happening the penknife flicked out and I grabbed for the bag. She fought back. I had to be quick to succeed and my hand clenching the knife reached to help its other. However, my hand slipped. It was too late. The knife was in her. The bag in my hand. I had to run.

"Accident," I gurgle.

"An accident? I had to watch from across the road as you killed the woman I love. I was withdrawing money while she was alone with you. A monster." He sobs. "When I got to her she was cold. Blood was everywhere. She looked at me with her beautiful emerald green eyes. Smiled. Then died." He is silent for a few moments before I feel another twist of the knife in my chest." I watched her die in my arms. Then I saw you further up the road and pulled the knife from her stomach. I chased you. I needed to take away her pain, it had to be dulled. I had to make sure she could go. So that means you must go. A creature like you has to die and I dont care about the consequences."

I sensed madness in his voice. Only one 'd' in madness. I'd taken everything from him and he was doing the same to me, I took his love and he was taking my life. He wanted revenge and was getting it. I felt so cold.

"You're going to die alone." He stood up and anger was flowing through his voice. "You will die from the blade you owned. Cold on a empty street, in a pool full of blood, on your own."

He spat onto the floor then walked away. His footsteps are the last thing I hear before everthing goes still. Silence. Darkness. Remorse.