(This is assuming the ninja is of the male species)
Pros:
1. He’d never leave the toilet seat up (he's so ninja he doesn't have to open it in the first place)
2. You’re always sure of getting back at that annoying neighbor
3. He can karate-chop open those packages you’d usually have to impale on a ballista to open
4. Katanas make [bleep]-ing awesome conversational items
5. He can get things off the top shelf for you easily
6. He can shuriken birds that wake you up in the morning
7. Make him go shopping and he’ll be back before you can say Wolverine – and without any cost
8. Sexy ninja secrets means you’ll never get bored of your partner
9. Jackie Chan is a personal friend
10. You get stolen diamonds and mystical jewelry as gifts for birthdays and Christmas
11. Ninjas would make awesome pizzas
Cons:
1. You’ll come home every few weeks to find your mirrors smashed, your pillows ripped and your computer stolen by some dastardly thugs
2. You have to comfort him every time he comes home after being owned by Batman – which is often
3. He doesn’t speak
4. Every few months you have to change your identity and move towns
5. In summer he sweats like… something that sweats a lot under all the black and leaves your house stinky
6. His colleges always try to poison you
7. You realize they actually can’t do parkour because it’s French
8. Tropical vacations turn into clichéd action plots
9. Your husband is constantly dragging dead bodies onto your pristine carpet
10. You can’t show your doting girlfriends what your mysterious, sexy boyfriend looks like because all you see in the pictures are blurs
11. You'd have to actually catch one in the first place!
So it's up to you, ladies! Personally, I think I'm going to stick to my nerds
~Love Durrs
