Ugly and Beautiful, Terrible and Amazing.

Spoiler

For each stanza but the last, there is a corresponding one. The first and the 18th, second and the 19th, third and 20th, and so on.

I'm a leader,
but a born follower.

A traveler that needs
to settle down somewhere.

A boy trapped
in a girl's body.

A wooded creature
enclosed by stone.

I'm a color not allowed
into the rainbow.

A long book
with my pages ripped out.

A best friend to myself,
but always the enemy.

I'm a spiral stair-
case stuck straight.

A detailed math book
in a science room.

I'm blue eyes
trapped by murky brown.

Spices lined up uselessly
on the marble kitchen floor.

I'm a volleyball player
on the basketball team,

A portable laptop
glued to the table,

A plush, pretty toy
that shall never be used.

A brand new pen
that ran out of ink,

A strawberry growing
on a pepper plant.

I'm ugly, disgusting,
and I'll never fit in.

But I refuse to stop leading
the stubborn mule that I am.

Never settle down
anywhere in the whole world.

I'll let my meager,
feminine self out.

Embrace the difference
that defines me.

I'll make my own sparking
rainbow, it'll be better than the others.

Write all new pages,
better then the first.

Become only myself to me,
a neutral ground.

I'll never quit trying to bend,
because I know I'm getting somewhere.

Draw about dinosaurs
on every single page.

Break through the mud
that holds me back.

I'll make myself beautiful,
for my sure-to-come company.

I'll learn basketball quickly
or die trying to score.

Cut all the glue from under me,
the glue that will never let go.

I'll find a new kid,
She'll love me forever.

Use water, oil, anything
to be usable again.

I'll take the difference and use it to
my own advantage, make myself better.

I'm beautiful, amazing,
and I'll be the shining star.

Whatever it is, I'm me.
And guess what? I love it.

Really deep...almost made me cry.
But then again, I am easily moved.
Bottom line, beautiful piece.

Hello! Nice poem, very real. Not much to say, other then a few suggestion:

Blue: Things I think would help the poem, baced on my opinion.
Red: Error in grammar/puncuation.
Pink /Purple: Things I really like.
Green: Other comments.

I'm a leader,
but a born follower.

Placing comma's and periods in the right places will really make this poem easier to read and make it flow better.
I think this stanza would flow better if you mave "but" to the beginning of the next line.

A traveler that needs
to settle down somewhere. << Should be a period.

A boy trapped
in a girl's body.

A wooded creature
enclosed by stone. << Love this.

I'm a color denied
into the rainbow.

I get what your saying here,^^ but only after thinking about it for a second. It was the "denied into" part. It kinda messed me up. Maybe rephrase it? Or not. It may just be me.

A long book
with my pages ripped out.

Same with the first stanza here. I think this may read better with "with" as the beginning of the next line.

A best friend to myself,
but always the enemy. << Love this part too.

I'm a spiral stair- case stuck straight.
Make this into two lines, but not just as it is, you need to add some words to make it work. I'd say have the first line "I'm a spiral stair-case" Then on from there. I thought of "Run out straight" when I read it, but that is jsut me.

A detailed math book
in a science room.

I'm blue eyes,
trapped by murky brown.

I think you get the idea.

Spices lined up uselessly
on the marble kitchen floor.

Just a suggestion

I'm a volleyball player
on the basketball team.

A portable laptop
glued to the table.

A plush, pretty toy
that shall never be used.

A brand new pen
that ran out of ink.

A strawberry growing
on a pepper plant. << Love this! Its just neat to think about.

I'm ugly, disgusting,
and I'll never fit in.

But I refuse to stop leading
the stubborn mule that I am.

Never settle down any-
where in the whole world.

"Anywhere" is one word. I would keep "anywhere" at the beginning of the second line.

I'll let my meager,
feminine self out.

Embrace the difference
that defines me.

I'll make my own sparking
rainbow, honest and true.

Honest and true" just doesn't sound right to me.

Write all new pages,
better then the first.

Become only myself to me,
a neutral ground.

I'll never quit trying to bend,
because I know I'm getting somewhere.

Draw about dinosaurs
on every single page.

Break through the mud
that holds me back.

I'll make myself beautiful,
for my sure-to-come company.

I'll learn basketball quickly
or die trying to score the basket.

I think you could take this out. I think it would help the words flow better.

Cut all the glue from under me,
The glue that will never let go. << This should be lower case.

Another suggestion

I'll find a new kid,
She'll love me forever.

Use water, oil, anything
to be usable again.

I'll take the difference and use it to
my own advantage, make myself better.

I'm beautiful, amazing,
And I'll be the shining star. << Lower case.

Whatever it is, I'm me.
And guess what? I love it. << Love the ending.

Overall, I think its great! It has a good message. Just fix up a few things and your quite good to go!

Hope this helps,

~Rain~

Very strange...
I'm not into poetry, so I won't try to review at all. (Prolly should'a said "can't review")
Suffice to say, though, that I liked it!

Hi! I'm pointe and I'm going to review you today!

I'm a leader but
a born follower

A traveler that needs
to settle down somewhere,

A boy trapped
in a girl's body,
WHAT??

A wooded creature
enclosed by stone.

I'm a color denied
into the rainbow,

A long book with
my pages ripped out,

A best friend to myself
but always the enemy.

I'm a spiral stair- case stuck straight,

A detailed math book
in a science room.

I'm blue eyes trapped
by murky brown,

Spices lined up uselessly
on the marble floor.

I'm a volleyball player
on the basketball team,

A portable laptop
glued to the table,

A plush, pretty toy that
shall never be used.

A brand new pen
that ran out of ink,

A strawberry growing
on a pepper plant.

I'm ugly, disgusting,
and I'll never fit in.

But I refuse to stop leading
the stubborn mule that I am.

Never settle down any-
where in the whole world,

I'll let my meager
feminine self out,

Embrace the difference
that defines me.

I'll make my own sparking
rainbow, honest and true,

Write all new pages
better then the first,

Become only myself to
me, a neutral ground.

I'll never quit trying to bend
because I know I'm getting somewhere,

Draw about dinosaurs
on every single page.

Break through the mud
that holds me back,

I'll make myself beautiful,
for my sure-to-come company.

I'll learn basketball quickly
or die trying to score the basket,

Cut all the glue under me,
The glue that will never let go.

I'll find a new kid,
She'll love me forever,

Use water, oil, anything
to be usable again.

I'll take the difference and use it to
my own advantage, make myself better.

I'm beautiful, amazing,
And I'll be the shining star.

Whatever it is, I'm me.
And guess what? I love it.
this is sooo awesome I feel wrong nit-picking
~POinte

I'm not sure the Boy trapped in a girl's body is necessary, but nevertheless, good job.

Thanks everyone!

Alright, so, I'm not exactly sure what to say here. I liked it, and it was good. However,

I'm a leader,
but a born follower.

A traveler that needs
to settle down somewhere.

A boy trapped
in a girl's body.

A wooded creature
enclosed by stone.

I'm a color not allowed
into the rainbow.

A long book
with my pages ripped out.

A best friend to myself,
but always the enemy.

I'm a spiral stair-
case stuck straight.

A detailed math book
in a science room.

I'm blue eyes
trapped by murky brown.

Spices lined up uselessly
on the marble kitchen floor.

I'm a volleyball player
on the basketball team,

A portable laptop
glued to the table,

A plush, pretty toy
that shall never be used.

A brand new pen
that ran out of ink,

A strawberry growing
on a pepper plant.

Just, all of this was good, until about the fifth stanza in. Then it just got somewhat boring and repetitive. I'd cut some of those little couplets


Using couplets was a great idea. It made the poem seem that much powerful and had that much more impact.
Nice work, overall.

~WickedWonder

hello, its Le, and guess what? I love it. I think that it is really good. I was long, but not super long. And I like the way you did the stanzas and I like the way that you made the storyline go. I love the way you wrote this. and how long did it take to write it?

I loved this poem a lot! It was really deep - and I could relate. I love poems like these - about being yourself and not caring what others think. Make your own rainbow! Whoo!

Anyways, I loved this!
-Echoes