Salvation

Over fields and hills he wanders,
eyes and thoughts and minds he ponders,
dreaming hard and dreaming long,
stopping just to hear a song.
The sound, so full it makes him cry,
would be a gentle lullaby
if not for sadness shot so deep
within him, barring tender sleep.
He cries for slumber taken 'way,
he cries for rest's encumbered bay,
once blue, but now tinged orange and red
with blood of child, once live; now dead.
He cries for sound as well, you see,
for all it seems to all the free,
and through his sanity, repealed,
his vision lies, at last revealed.

Hi, Ligea! I'm Freak.

I like this a lot. You have great imagery and I can almost feel the emotions!
But, there are nitpicks:

Over fields and hills he wanders,
eyes and thoughts and minds he ponders,
dreaming hard and dreaming long,
stopping just to hear a song. I feel like this sentence is too long and I don't get what you are trying to say
The sound, so full it makes him cry,
would be a gentle lullaby
if not for sadness shot so deep
within him, barring tender sleep.
He cries for slumber taken 'way,
he cries for rest's encumbered bay,
once blue, but now tinged orange and red
with blood of (Try adding, "...of a child" child, once live; now dead.
He cries for sound as well, you see,
for all it seems to all the free, This doesn't make sense
and through his sanity, repealed,
his vision lies, at last revealed.

Anyway, very good job. You're a great writer, so write on. PM me for anything.

~Freak

Hey, I think your writing is really good here! some great images being conjured up. Well done

Okay, to begin with, I'll explain exactly how I went about reading this; 1. I read through it once. 2. I turned away from it for a moment, and thought ot myself, wow. 3. Then I read it again, this time faster. 4. And again, slower.
If that doesn't say how I felt about this poem, this will; I loved it. It's a very versatile poem, can be read many different ways, and it's catchy. The character is evidently a vagabond, and has much to think about, with plenty of time ot do it in. I have read very few poems in which what you have accomplished here is managed. You leave us guessing, and yet at the same time give a certain satisfaction to us at the end. Very clever indeed.