The Play of Life

The stage is set
The bow is taken
The curtains close
The act is over
Let's see who knows
Take off the mask
Can't escape the past
The pain and despair are coming fast

Will the haunted ever rest?

decent. not bad. I'm not a fan of this style of poetry, but taking that biased out of it it wasot bad. My biggest ssue is how vauge it is, vaugeness is the gateway drug to cliches and melodrama.

indianapolisatheart wrote:The stage is set
The bow is taken. you may want clarify what prevelence this has in the poem, it seems ambigous
The curtains close
The act is over
Let's see who knows knows what? again vague, and never clarified later in the poem
Take off the mask
Can't escape the past bordering on cliche
The pain and despair are coming fast both "pain" and "despair" are vauge words unless put into a specific context and together can become trite

Will the haunted ever rest? i like the closing line and the spacing from the rest of the stanza

I have to agree Erinaghdra in saying that it is a little vague and the ending was kind of rushed. I liked the beginning because I understand the meaning but you lose me at the end where it says:
Can't escape the past
The pain and despair are coming fast
Will the haunted ever rest?

this kind of ruins the whole "poseur" thing I think you were trying to go for. I won't try to make up a line for you because I hate when people tell me what I should write but I will just offer some advice in saying that maybe you could make it longer so we could get the story line you were going for.

I totally come to feel what you feel when reading this poem.
But you kind of leave me wondering about the last three lines. Care to elaborate?

Like others have said I share thie r points.

My only other nit pick would be the first two lines contradict each other. The stage isn't classed as set if it is at it has finished. Just thought I point it out. It was okay though. . .

PM me for anything.

~Retro Disco666

This poem is awsome! If only it were longer It remindes me of what Shakesphere said about the world being a stage and all of that. This is really, really good.

This poem isnt just about you taking off a mask after a play, it's talking about how people hide who they really are and I love that this poem gets that point across. It was very good, short and sweet and I love that.

Basically, the poem is about how people act as if its okay. Wearing a "mask" so to speak, to keep their true feelings hidden. As soon as the "mask" is taken off the feelings and emotions catch up and no one ever really knows who the real "you" is. The last three lines speaks mainly about how the past will always come back, and how the pain and hurt that you've received will creep up to haunt to and you'll never be able to get your mind completely off of it.