In An Alternate Universe

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I hope this poem will make up for the fact I haven't been on here for awhile. Pretty too the point, so I hope you like it! -Jane

In an alternate universe
We would be lovers.
We would skip in the summer sun
Like cliched idiots
Who only know happiness
In a Nora Ephron movie.
We would dance slowly,
You would hold my waist,
We would kiss passionately
And move to Cloud Nine.

In an alternate universe
You woud call me 'baby' and 'cupcake'.
We would share spaghetti
A la Lady and the Tramp.
You would buy me tulips
Since roses are overrated.
We would love the night away.

We live in this universe,
Unfortunately.
You would only notice me
If I complimented your letter jacket
And last night's touchdown.
You would smile hesitantly,
Walk away, and
Wonder what my name is...
...That hipster girl.

We live in this universe.
I am stubborn.
You are arrogant.
I will have a family one day.
The wife of a distinguished attorney;
Kids with chocolate hair.
Least could be said for you.
My children will not have hay hair like yours.
It's painful you know;
Wanting someone so badly
But knowing you will never have them.
Maybe you should try.
Apple of my soul,
Eats me whole,
Take one bite,
No delight,
Rotting hole.




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Gender Female
Points 1094
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I really loved this. I like how you're specific with the experiences the narrator has had, if that is you. I like it especially, because I know I'm speaking for a lot of people when I say I can really relate to this poem. Just remember to always keep writing. You're an amazing writer.
What is writing without criticism?




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Points 1040
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Excellent unambiguousness of the experiences.




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Gender Female
Points 8691
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I loved this! Well that's pretty much all I can say.
You must be swift as the coursing river,
With all the force of a great typhoon,
With all the strength of a raging fire,
Mysterious as the dark side of the moon.



Don't gobblefunk around with words.
— Roald Dahl