The Prophecy (Chapter Four)

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This is chapter four. Hope you like it and please review it!! 8)
The grounds were deserted. To quiet for anyones liking. The girls had crept through the corridors, making only the slightest sounds. They exited the Manor through a side door instead of the main entrance as they new it would make to much noise. They scurried around the building, now facing the gardens that grew peacfully at the front of Layro Manor.
The gravel crunched beneath their feet as they steadily manouvered around the grand marble funtain, which was positioned in the middle of the drive, and hurried onto the soft turf pathway that ran through the gardens and out the other side to the woods.
Towering hedges and bare trees casted shadows in the moonlight, which created darkness around the girls. Leila held the tourch firmly in her hand and slowly flicked it on. In one swift movement the darkness disappeared and was replaced by a hazy, yellow light.
As minutes passed, the path seemed like it would go on for ever. Lucy watched the ground before them and noticed a quick change in colour. She raised her head, noticing the end of the hedge row. Leila held a finger to her lips. At this moment silence was key. Lucy grabbed Leila's hand, a sudden rush of fear flowed through her.
The pale green path turned into a dark and dingy green. A wooden fence sectioned the gardens from the woods. Leila climbed over first. I go first. If anything happens to Lucy I'll never forgive myself. Leila helped lucy over.
The ground was soggy and although the trees were completely bare they kept any light from reaching the floor level. The sisters stepped deeper into the woods, listening for any unusual sounds. The wind whistled as it brushed through the branches creating a chill in the air.
A twig breaking echoed infront of them making Leila dart behind a tree. She breathed deeply trying to listen for the sound again, but it didn't come. She bent her head around the trunk and, feeling it safe to do so, continued to walk.
"It's O.K Lucy. It must of been a rabbit or something." she said, trying to make her sister and herself feel less scared. Leila expected her sister to retaliate, saying herself that she wasn't scared, but no sound came from behind her. Leila turned around, her heart beating fast. Lucy had gone. The sound of lots of twigs breaking came from behind her. The sound got louder and louder until whoever, or whatever, was making that noise was to close for Leila to outrun it. A beast, as big as as a caravan, was hurteling itself towards her with an almighty force. It's soggy, black, fur coat blended into the night and it's claws and fangs, that were as big as the branches it was breaking, were drenched in blood. Leila fell backwards, her arm covering her eyes. She expected to feel the excrutiating pain of claws ripping her up, piece by piece, but instead, all she felt was a slight wind brush past her. She opened her eyes. Infront of her stood a boy, about the same age as herself. His crimson hair fell across his face and as her looked at her, his arm outstretched, his hazel eyes almost entranced her. She reached out, grabbing his hand, and pulled herself back onto her feet. Lucy ran up to her sister and hugged her.
"Your O.K!" Leila cried, but a loud scream infront of her cut through the reunited moment. A young girl, with hair and eyes similar to the teen's, wielded a large sword above her head. She brought it down to earth with the tip of the blade imbedding into the beasts foot. A large howl came from the beast and it staggered back into the woods, taking the sword with it. The boy put a hand on Leila's shoulder.
"You should be glad that your sister found us before you and that beast became more acquainted."




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Actually, your beginning id quite good. Your description is strong and beautiful

The grounds were deserted. To quiet for anyones liking. The girls had crept through the corridors, making only the slightest sounds. They exited the Manor through a side door instead of the main entrance as they new it would make to much noise. They scurried around the building, now facing the gardens that grew peacfully at the front of Layro Manor.


Too. you mean too there.
and that would be my only nitpick.

I'm going to read back to see what happened, and Im excited to see what happens next
~WickedWonder
'We will never believe again, kick drum beating in my chest again, oh, we will never believe in anything again, preach electric to a microphone stand.'

*Formerly wickedwonder*



No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace as I have seen in one autumnal face.
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