This Love

Yes, I know this poem has a LOT a repitision... Reveiws please, good or bad, I like the, all!


This love
is never spoken
this love
leaves me broken
this love
is divine
this love
that is mine
this love
is hidden behind lies
this love
is seen in my eyes

This is my love
for razors and pain
this is my love
that keeps me sane
this is my love
for cutting away
this is my love
that is the only way
this is my love
I found two years ago
this is my love
that I can’t let go.

SilentRain wrote:This is my love
for razors and pain
~~~
for cutting away

O.K. I really like this poem and the repetition is used well. It doesn't take anything away from the poem. But, the lines I made bold above ^ confused me. The rest of the poem I felt happiness was the biggest thing here. But, razors? Pain? I am not sure what you mean here. It confuses me and I am not sure what the meaning is anymore. Does it have a deeper one. I guess I didn't really help you...

Sorry,

A. S.

I think I know what you are talking about here.
And I sincerely hope it's not about you.
I like the repeating of "This is my love"
But for some reason I can imagine you could add bit more emotional into this.
It is good though, no doubt. Just my opinion is all

MikaFreak123 wrote:I think I know what you are talking about here.
And I sincerely hope it's not about you.
I like the repeating of "This is my love"
But for some reason I can imagine you could add bit more emotional into this.
It is good though, no doubt. Just my opinion is all

I agree with MikaFreak123. I hope it's not about you.I really enjoyed reading it and I hope that you will write more.

Keep writing,
Alicia.

Hello! Book here. I really like this poem :3, i loved that you repeated "this love".
But i didn't get the "razor and pain" part. it just doesn't seem to fit to me. I could tell that this poem has a lot of emotion, which i like!

Well,that's all i have to say for now . Keep writing! and i hope this review helped you in some way (even though i suck at reviewing poems :p )

~Book Person~

This is an antithesis, it compares two differant ideas, to mean one over all thing in the end... I used "This Love" as a way to say something like "This Addiction" "this Problem" something like that... It is kinda confussing, but ya...

~Rain~

This poem really makes me think.. About how we reguard love.. I think that you did a very original way to show that. good job

I found this poem captivating, you should take more advantage of those captivating qualities and add more descriptive words that would add just that much more emotion into the work. The poem was somewhat short but the repetition worked well however, i found the lines,"is hidden behind lies," and,"that is the only way," to make a noticeable change in the overall flow of the poem. less harmonious then the rest of the lines.

This is beautiful; like, actually beautiful. I can almost feel the pain of it all. The repetition makes it all work too. It's lovely.

it is great.