November light

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Gender Male
Points 890
Reviews 66
(A small poem)

November Light

November light, you’re trying to fit in
A place where nobody knows your name
November light, look around
You don’t belong here

Can you see the rain pouring down?
Your refuge and your strength
Can you feel it’s earnest power, it’s sincerity for you, it’s love?
Reach out, touch it.

And when it’s all gone
You’ll return home
Once your hands are dry…
Once you surpass this…
Created for light…
November light shines no more.
Cuz I'm praying for rain and I'm praying for tidal waves.
I wanna see the ground give way. I wanna watch it all go down.




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Gender Female
Points 23425
Reviews 566
This is an interesting idea. I like how you used personification to make the light seem like it feels like an outcast. The idea reminds me a little of November Rain by Guns 'n' Roses. The third line of the second stanza is a little too long to fit in with the rest of the poem, and I don't really like the ellipses in the last stanza, I don't think they're necessary. Overall, not bad. It didn't blow me away, but not bad at all.
Matt.



The grand in the hotel rings with broken tunes; the guests frown; the concierge winces. But the blue-hatted boy is happy and braver than they.
— TheMythMaster