It's the Way...

Minute long write.
Thanks for feedback.


It’s the inaudible,
the way you smile
and laugh inside closed lips-
it’s the way your eyes
crease and fold,
finding their homes
in the yet-to-be laugh lines.
It’s the way you stand
like you’re trying to contain yourself
when anything good happens-
the way your enthusiasm
simply exudes from your stance
and the way that when I
see you happy,
I can’t help but be too.

It’s the way you make life easy
and all the bad things just
go away.
They’re there, and they’re still bad,
but they don’t really matter
because I have so much good
right here, in my life
and in your little lopsided smile
that it would be unfair,
almost too perfect,
for there not to be anything else.
It’s the way you come home
and find me first thing
to talk about our days
and all the doubts of happy
just wash away.
It’s the way you help me with everything
even when I’m too blind
to realize I need it.
It’s the way that
even in the worst of moments
you’re there, wrapping
comfortable arms
and kissing away my tears
gentle as a butterfly,
and they turn into tears
of love and laughter.

It’s the way
that I almost seem the welcome the bad,
want it,
because I know that no matter what
you’ll always be there,
and on the other side,
and happiness will only be that much better
once the bad is gone.

Hi,

This flows nicely and there's a good sense of rhythm.

I'd cut the second "the", and put a full-stop after "lips" and a comma after "fold".

I like "like you're trying to contain yourself."

I felt that the second stanza was too much telling and not enough showing. There was too much speech directed at the character, telling them their worth in plain terms. I'd focus on the reader, rather than on the characters. Show the reader how this character makes life more pleasant than the speaker rather than saying it. Give little scenes which show his/her kindness and consideration for the speaker and the things they do to make the speaker's life better.

Hope this helps,
Jas