YWS (parody of Y.M.C.A)

I'm not sure if somebody has done this, but I thought that I'd give it a try. I need a bit of help with it because some words don't seem very natural. Oh, and this is my first parody!

Writers, you may feel quite afraid
I said writers, cause’ you may need some aid
I said writers; you have to pull yourself up
You will feel really happy

Writers, there’s a website to go on
I said writers, something to smile upon
You can join there, and I’m sure you’ll attend
You’re bound to find some great friends

It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s got everything to, make you smile
We know you’ll be there for quite a while

Its fun to be at the YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
You can post your work up
You can get good critique
You can learn some new, great technique

Writers. Are you listening to me
I said writers, I’m sure you’ll agree
I said writers; you can make your dreams big
But you have to remember…

Writers, if you become famous
I said writers, remember where you came from
And mention you were at YWS
It’s something you need to express

It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s got everything to make you smile
We know you’ll be there for quite a while

Its fun to be at the YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
You can post your work up
You can get good critique
You can learn some new, great technique

Writers, you may feel quite afraid
I said writers, cause’ you may need some aid

I said writers; you have to pull yourself up
You will feel really happy

Writers, there’s a website to go on
I said writers, something to smile upon
You can join there, and I’m sure you’ll attend
You’re bound to find some great friends

It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s got everything to make you smile
We know you’ll be there for quite a while

YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
It’s fun to be at the YWS
Writers, writers, you may feel afraid
Writers, writers, you may need some aid

YWS
Just join the YWS
Writers, writers, get some good critique
Writers, writers, learn some new, fun technique

YWS
YWS
YWS
YWS

Yeeeeah taffy!! You tell them!

Now lyrics are hard to review, because it's YOUR opinion and YOUR words. So I'll just express my opinion:
I completely agree! Young Writer's Society is awesome! Though I have to ask...how would you make the "W"?

Tam Tam:

*cracks knuckles and dusts off reviewing pen*

It's been forever since I've done a review, and lyrics are something I dig, and I especially love good parodies, so here we go.

As far as being a song praising YWS, spot on. Made your points clear, etc. etc. Excellent.

The only major problems are with the rhythm of the lyrics. Parodies are tough because you have to fit a pre-existing style and rhythm. There are a few places where you missed. When I try parodies (which aren't very often, but occasionally), I like to take the lyrics that are already there, and count out the syllables of the song. That way, I know how to pick my words to fit the rhythm and still have an effective parody.

That being said, this parody is a good start. Could use a little tweaking, but then again, what doesn't.

A good parody is, "Look! Here's a song, and here are words that I put to the song!"
A great parody is, "Look! Here's a song, and here are words that I put to the song, and it all fits!"

Hope that helped,
kf

*claps*
I love this!
And to answer Razi's questions. This is how you would make a 'W', but you'd need two people. Unless there's a way to do it by yourself Haha
Anyways, I don't have much to critique, although I do agree with what Femzo said. But again, you stated you needed help with getting the lyrics right but unfortunately, I stink that that >.<
You did amazing anyways!
*like*

~Pink

Ahaha! That is just so hilarious! I loved it, Tam!

~Sakin

Haha. I love it. Good job, Tam.
~Ladypurple~

I liked it..

OH MY GOSH BEST SONG EVER!!!!!!!!!! GO YWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

xD
Tam, I love you!! We've got to make this our national anthem. Definately. It made me laugh the whole way through, and I may or may not have started singing once or twice...>.> Don't look at me like that dad! O.o
*Cough*
Anyways, other than what Flemmy said, I got nothing. This was wonderful

This should be the YWS theme song!!!

Thanks for all the feedback, and whoop, it's featured!

@Felmzo I know that some things sound a bit off, I'm altering it so hopefully it will be better.


Everyone else, thanks so much! I hope this will be the YWS National Anthem, after a few modifications of course

*Tamara*

I really like this parody!! Good idea with the whole YMCA/ YWS but I agree that it needs to flow better (basically what Flemzo said). This is my first time properly on YWS (like you know) so ... WELL DONE ;D

Firstly, this is a great song!!!

Anywho down to some reviewing...

As people have said before me there are a few places that are out of rhythm due to either not having enough syllables or too many. As for those that have too many syllables, sometimes it's O.K. because it depends on how fast you end up saying the words. For example the first line of your second stanza "Writers, there's a website to go on." It sort of has one too many syllables, but it can work if the "to go" it sung quickly. Or you could change it to something like "Writer's there's a website that's fun" or something like that. If you are stuck on rhymes there are a few websites that can help.

Another bit of rhythm that's a little off is in the chorus. The first two lines are awesome. (It's really cool how the YWS/YMCA thing worked out!) The other two lines are a troublesome. The smile line is lacking a lot of syllables and as for the line after that it is mostly O.K., but just omit the "quite" to make it will flow nicely.

Overall, this is a fun piece and really cool for your first parody. I recommend, though, singing with the music and if there are any lines that trip you up rhythm-wise go back and look them over. Also it may help to find the lyrics to the original song just to see exact syllables. Good job!

Hey Tam,
Love the theme song we should definitely use it!!!!
-lilgreendots

Ha! This is really cool! I congratulate you on your creativity. ; ) Nice work, this is fun and it made me laugh!