Killer Mask [0.09]

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The nurses trust me enough to let me out of the cell… for a little while. They herd me downstairs, into the brightly lit cafeteria. The colourful tables are arranged in circular patterns, and the tiled floor is swept clean. A woman wearing a hairnet stands behind a window-like structure, clutching a ladle.

I slink to the centre of the room and sit at a table. It is nearly empty, except for a girl who looks about my age. I smile a little and sit in the chair across to her.

“Hey. I’m Isabelle.” I say.

“Hi! Finally! It’s about time they let someone in here that I can talk to.” The girl replies, flicking a blond curl behind her back. “I’m Mona, by the way.”

“You’ve been here for a while?” I question.

She chuckles. “Quite a while.”

“I’ve only been here for a week, maybe. I lost track after the first few days.” I admit.

“This place can do that to you. It makes you crazier than you were on the first day.”

“Ugh. Great.” I pout sourly.

“You get used to it.” She shrugs. She tears through a piece of blueberry bagel.

“So… why are you here?” I venture.

“Well, the obvious reason. I made a few mistakes… that I’m not proud of.” She whispers.

“Same… I passed out while purging. They put me in the hospital and then freaked out so I wound up here."

She sighs heavily. It’s clear that she’s not going to say any more.

A nurse interrupts us. “Mona, it’s time to go back to your room.”

“Well, see you.” Mona waves. I smile because I’ve finally met someone in jail.

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It’s been two days since I’ve met Mona. I haven't spoken to her since we met.. So far my day has consisted of doctors, needles, and charts.

Dr. Joyce has diagnosed me with some kind of mental disorder. Fitting, right? I didn’t exactly catch the name of it, because I was zoned out. I’m sure he’ll tell me about it again.

Let the freak show continue…




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Gender Female
Points 805
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Hey,

Lol, as ususal I like it. I can definitely see this becoming a novel. I like the character Mona and the cafeteria scene but this would have been the obvious place to add in her disgust or terorr of eating on her own again. It seems like she went to a lounge rather than a dining room. After Mona leaves, you should continue the cafeteria scene and the confrontation of food and her going back to her room and stuff. Overall, it's soooo much easier to read and I really love this story :) Nice job.


~Jasmine Bells
I am nothing
but a mouthful of 'sorry's, half-hearted
apologies that roll of my tongue, smoothquick, like 'r's
or maybe like pocket candy
that's just a bit too sweet.

~*~



*gestures in butterfly meme*
— BluesClues