Love

Love,
Your name I hear,
Everywhere I turn.
Who you really are, I know not
Just some whispers
Muttered in utter silence.

Its said you come to everyone,
When will you come to me?
No, that isn't what I wanted to ask,
How will I know its you?

Am told that its in the first touch,
That I will see you in their eyes
That they carry you in their smiles,
All those are fairy tales.
So I wait upon God to reveal you,
When you arrive,
If you arrive.

Hey this was a good poem.
I really liked it, but just at the end i think instead of

When you arrive,
If you arrive

It should say

When you arrive,
I will see you.

But otherwise very good.

Hi,

I love the internal rhyme of "muttered in utter". I also like how it is Love being addressed.

I'd put an ellipses instead of a comma after "ask".

The string of cliches in the last stanza was a bit mundane and when you tried to shatter them it ended up in just another cliche, with "fairytales". I'd go for a fresher, more surprising definition of what these stories are, and would also be more visual for the stories themselves.

The best thing you can do for your poetry is read poetry. Anthologies are great. One of my favourites is "No Bliss Like This."

Hope this helps,

Jas

I think I like it. It is special and the way it is written, it sends out different meanings I think all at once; which in sense I think makes a good poem.
I can totally relate to this poem especially the second stanza because I ask my self the same thing everyday . Yeah. And the last three lines of the last stanza, you nailed that part I should have to say. Its some deep stuff. And like I said, I can relate because I ask myself that same question and the same statements. And so you did a great job at putting those emotions into words; into a poem. Bravo!

Ello there, sweet. I see you have joined the brave band of poets throughout history who have dared to write about the great mystery they call Love. Actually, I must confess, I was rather surprised to see you are a guy (unless you fibbed about your gender). One rarely sees males writing poetry at all, let alone poetry about Love. For that, I applaud you. The poem, though perhaps not the greatest thing since Shakespeare, was, I think, heartfelt and genuine. I do indeed hope you find that ever-elusive Love. But stay on your toes; she's a hard one to catch.

I want to say thanks to all of you for the review next time I will do better.
And jessy what i meant by that last line "when you arrive, if you arrive" is that I doubt if love will ever come to me.
and princess we guys still know something about love.
Am planning on making it a sequel of atleast three, when am thrugh with the second one i will paste it .
Once again thanks.

Hey, I'm Dreamy, and I'll be reviewing your poem today. Let's start with nitpicks, in red.

Love.
Your name I hear,
Everywhere I turn.(This part doesn't make much sense. Are you specifying a person, or love itself?)
Who you really are, I know not.
Only whispers;
Muttered in utter silence.

Its said you come to everyone,
When will you come to me?
No, that isn't what I wanted to ask,(don't contradict youself in writing. Just get rid of this line.)
How will I know its you? (but keep this.)

I'm told that it's in the first touch,
That I will see you in their eyes,
That they carry you in their smiles.
All those are fairy tales.
So I wait upon God to reveal you,
When you arrive,
If you arrive.

Okay, so this a decent poem. It shows a lot of promise. I find it confusing, though, and I had to read it several times to understand that you were talking to love itself. I think with some editing and a little rewriting, this will be very good.

Keep writing!

-Dreamy