Words

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We're taught the lessons early on,
to watch our choice of words.
They don't hurt, they say, like sticks and stones,
they leave scars beyond recognition.
We all utter certain words from time to time,
despite our humble admission.
But words are tools, not meant to be weapons.
utilize them with precaution.
"Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself." ~Harvey Fierstein




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Hey hobbit!

I really like the idea that you had about words leaving scars beyond all recognition... it's really powerful! I think that you should develop this idea a lot more and use forceful imagery to really go into depth about what kinds of scars they leave, etc. The rest of the poem that you have is a little bit on the preachy side, so I probably would get rid of that.

Happy editing! :D
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D




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A Poem about Words

Preach! My minister.
Your pretentious drivel
Makes me feel a bit sickle
Sorry but my words attack
Please duck and cover
We denounce your life and soul
For submitting us to this whole
loadacrap.




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Hiya!

I really liked this poem, and didn't think the end was preachy at all. I agree with what Snoink said about developing the idea about what kinds of scars the words leave. And I'd go back and capitalize the first letter of every line, not just the words that are the beginning of a sentence. Other than that, I found reading this piece very enjoyable!

Keep writing!

~Mel
"Don't say 'the old lady screamed'- bring her on and let her scream." -Mark Twain

Writing is like traveling- you never know what's going to happen until you get there.




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Cool poem. And I have to agree I didn't think it was preachy at all! :)



Life, although it may only be an accumulation of anguish, is dear to me, and I will defend it.
— Mary Shelley, Frankenstein