This has all the elements of an assigned poetry review, which I am supposing it is! And this is something of a good thing because I bet this is something you wrote for an assigned poetry review! But, though you seem to be able to say the meaning of the poem, it doesn't seem like you really understand the meaning, if that makes any sense. Good poetry reviews will always relate back to with your own personal experiences and make a connection between the real world and poetry, since the two intertwine. In my college literature class, this connection was what my professor was looking for, more than any explanation.
So yes, it works as a poetry review! But you can do so much more with this.
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.
"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach
I think this could do a little polishing. Review is a piece of literature that should be coherent and most of the times concise. You have made an ominous mistake of repeating and repeating thoughts taht should have appeared, at most, only once in the entire piece like this one:
"T.S. Elliot ominously describes these hollow men who have no purpose in life and have no reason to live. Not having a purpose in life is one of the main reasons that they are hollow. Their loss of purpose is caused by their loneliness and lack of faith in god. The opposite of these empty men are people who have an overall purpose in life. "
which also appeared in several pharagraphs as:
"“The Hollow Men” strangely describes this hollow men that have no reason or purpose to live their lives. These men are hollow because of their lack of purpose in life,"
"What makes the hollow men empty is their loss of purpose in life."
"In contrast to the hollow men are people who are living their life to the fullest because they have a purpose in life that they are working towards."
Anyways, I think you could work on presenting the general idea at the first paragraph and work on building up your points on the suceeding ones. Mentioning the main point is enough in the intorductory then prove that point in the next paragraphs by providing for the bases in fact and not-in-fact, by that i mean also delve on emotions and human experiences (yours and/or others) to make a delicious mix of theory-and-fact so as not to make your review a mundane narration of facts nor an overly dramatic exposition of emotions. just the right blend, okie?
Next, practice brevity. Do not repeat an idea on th succeeding sentences/paragraphs by rephrasing it. You have so much of it in here. Also, I think it would be more appropriate if you woud use the active voice, especially that this piece in non-fic. Anyway, that was just a suggestion.
I appreciate you mentioning other writers and comparing Elliot to Dante. You juxtaposed the poem with Paradiso which is also a method of explaining your point--that lack of faith is the reason of the hallow men being hollow; comparative lit, and I think that was nice use of it. Although you should watch out for grammar pitfalls and proofread your work. If you read it aloud and the sound of your words seemed awkward, there must be something wrong with them. If you are not so sure if your syntax is correct, you may consult somebody who might know.
I also liked your interpreting of symbols that really makes this piece a review. Literature is masked with so much symbols that sometimes it can be interpreted differently by different persons. I liked that you have made your own interpretation and proven them by supporting it with other lit piece. Although, as I said, this could be polished further.
You have a great potential at this, you just have to keep on going.
Have a nice day man!
At least now you can retrieve the black box from the twisted smoldering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her and analyze the data so that you don't crash into geek mountain again.
