My Unusual Morning

I was supposed to post this for the 9th Event but I didn't make it to the due date so I'm just posting it here and so that my work won't be wasted xD. Word Count: 247
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5:31 am – that was what my watch said. I found myself lying on the floor. I must have fallen from the bed.
“Darn it!” I exclaimed, but I was laughing at myself.
I stood up like a drunken old man, either fuzzy from my forgotten dream or my awful fall. I turned around to face the bathroom. I sauntered forward and paused at the doorway. I struggled with my feet and my sluggish body towards the mirror and looked at my reflection. My thoughts stuttered – I simply cannot describe myself! My hair was completely messy, I had these mysterious black eyes, and my face looked severely stressed!
“Who is this monster!?” I said to myself.
After washing my face a couple of times, I was unexpectedly confused whether I would already shower or eat breakfast first. Unexpectedly too, I showered, and I soaped myself before I shampooed my hair. I had my breakfast when I finished and got in the car afterwards.
“You’re early,” said my dad with no expression, but I can see that he felt content.
I smiled, knowing that I have pleased my father at least once in a week. Roads, traffic lights, people…I’ve seen them like everyday, but I found myself entertained. It was so unusual and weird.
Finally, I stepped out the car and fell. I heard my dad’s sound of surprise from the driver’s seat but I didn’t mind. I simply looked at my watch.
“Great!” I said. “I’m not late!’

Hello Whisper, I'll be your reviewer today.

So I'm trying to hear the voice of the narrator in my head and I'm getting this bland generic robot voice or something. No human voice at all. It's okay to have a voiceless narrator as long as you're writing in the 3rd person. If it's in the first person then you've gotta have a strong voice or the story's gonna turn stale. Have the narrator talk the way he would in real life.

The dialogue needs work too.

“Darn it!” I exclaimed, but I was laughing at myself.

-Unless it's 1952 when this story takes place, this dialogue doesn't seem very realistic. Have him use some vulgarity or something so it sounds like an actual person.

Another thing that needs work is the descriptions you used:

I simply cannot describe myself! My hair was completely messy, I had these mysterious black eyes, and my face looked severely stressed!

-Yes you can describe yourself. Don't just say your face was "severely stressed" describe the wrinkles on the corners of your mouth, the sunken eyes from lack of sleep, the stubble on your face from forgetting to shave (I'm assuming this character is old enough to shave but I'm not sure because you don't tell us.)
Leave out the adverbs and adjectives and give us concrete descriptions.

One more thing that bothered me was this:

After washing my face a couple of times, I was unexpectedly confused whether I would already shower or eat breakfast first. Unexpectedly too, I showered, and I soaped myself before I shampooed my hair.

For one, the first use of the word "unexpectedly" is kinda redundant because the fact that you say you are confused already suggests that you didn't expect to be that way.
The second "unexpectedly" I would just delete because it doesn't really add anything to the sentence.
And for future reference, try to avoid using the same word so close together.
It's one thing to use repetition, but you have to consider the proximity of your words and how they'll affect your reader.

Hai!

Okay, this was weird. I don't know what the rules for writing this was, but it would help if you made this so it's understandable for an outsider to read, as well as a person aware of the 9th Event. (Side note: that sounds really spooky. "Are you aware of the 9th Event?" Like a secret organisation.)

However, that aside there's still things you could improve on.

My thoughts stuttered – I simply cannot describe myself!

Tense switch here; you're in present when previously you've been in past.

My hair was completely messy, I had these mysterious black eyes, and my face looked severely stressed!

“Who is this monster!?” I said to myself.

Personally I don't like using exclamation marks in narrative as they look kinda childish. I'd remove the one after "stressed". It's not very pro to have two marks together as you have after "monster". It looks better and more confident to only have one.

Also, what's with the mysterious black eyes"? Has he changed during the night? And why does he look stressed when he's just woken up?


To summarise: confused. ^_^ This didn't make a lot of sense, and it would be good if it could stand up by itself outside of the event.