She was only sure about one thing, and that was that it was black. It was black above her, below her, between her fingers and every strand of her curly hair. It was the thick black, the black that you couldn’t breathe through, think through, live through.
Her heart sped up as she realized she was lost in a sea of darkness, and she began to gasp for air that was becoming increasingly harder to find. The fear and terror of the thought of death that seemed to be looming closer with each breathless moment was crushing her lungs, making it no easier to find the air that seemed to be eluding her.
Where am I? she thought, her heart continuing its hopeless race against death. What’s happening? Where’s Darell?
‘Darell’s right beside you,’ came a little voice to her mind. It startled her, for the voice was not hers, nor had she ever heard it before. It tinkled, like a bell, and perhaps it was how startled that voice had made her that pulled her back to the real world.
Colors began to swirl around Anna’s vision. For a moment, she wasn’t sure what was happening, until that curious little voice intruded again. ‘You’re dizzy.’
She blinked a few times, trying to get a grip on what was happening, trying to understand. As the world began to slow down, so did her heart, and she realized that she could breathe again. The air was cool and crisp, and thus refreshing to her burning lungs. It took her a few moments of staring to realize that she was looking upwards. The huge trees of the forest loomed above her, their dark leaves sparkling in the sunlight. The light bark had a beautiful contrast with the dark leaves, and it almost spell bounded her into sitting there, staring at the trees all day. But realization began to touch at her mind as memories came flying back. Her arriving late to the cabin, Darell’s urgency, them running through the forest, a group of men becoming visible between the trees as they shot at Darell and Anna with arrows, Darell getting an arrow in his side, her sobs, him falling to the ground . . .
Anna started and immediately pulled her eyes away from the trees. They looked to her left first, and when she saw nothing, she turned to her right. She only found him when she pulled her eyes to look directly in front of her, and she nearly kicked herself for not lookng there earlier.
A man lie there, stomach to the ground and one hand outstretched towards her as the other one was curled within his stomach, still reaching at his side. Her heart jumped in her throat, and she immediately longed for the darkness again, where at least she was sure of where she was and that she was dying, and not here where she was guessing.
Anna only knew she was shaking when she outstretched her hand and saw it, mingled with Darell's blood, quivering in the still wind. She took his arm, which was still slightly warm but had the frost of winter creeping over it, and rested three fingers--taking care not to use her thumb--against the main vain of his arm and waited.
Talking pulses was something Anna was never quite good at. Anything else in the clinic she had exceeded in, but when it came to the simple task of feeling a heart beat, she tended to quite often fail and only feel her own. But this time, she knew she was rght, because her heart had stopped at the sight of Darell's. Unfortunately, his had too.
It stopped.
She wasn’t sure whether it was her heart or the world that had stopped, but it didn’t really matter. Everything was still. Not a breeze rustled the trees, not an emotion leapt upon her heart. She didn’t know how to feel. Was she to feel angry at the men for killing him? Was she to feel happy that he was in a better place, where he didn’t have to run, didn’t have to hide? Was she to feel devastated that she had lost him, that she was now all alone in this world? None of the emotions seemed right. She had never loved anyone before, so she didn’t know how to feel when she lost him.
She waited for emotion desperately, staring at Darell for what felt like years. She knew she wanted him to be alive, but for what? It was a selfish desire, she knew that much, but nothing else she was sure of.
Voices intruded on her moment, and she paused to make sure they were real. Most of them were dark and deep, and she supposed that if she wasn’t so emotionless right then she’d be scared. Yet for some reason, she felt detached, as if she no longer belonged in this world anymore, as if there was somewhere else she was wanted, needed.
Men in black with quivers and bows broke through the trees and paused around her and Darell. They weren’t like the men she had acquainted with, but they seemed familiar all the same. She didn’t know why, until that tinkling little voice came back to her: ‘These are the men that killed Darell.’
‘The men that killed Darell.’ She had known that he was dead, but hearing the words made it real. Reality. Nothing else felt real. When life was real, it was simple. She understood. She was a nurse, forced into the practice by her father. She loved Darell, and felt like a different person around him, a sweeter, more sensitive person. He made her feel the way no one else ever could. And now he was gone, forever. Her eyes flickered back to his limp body, thrown on the ground uselessly. Uselessly...
"Get up!" Anna was surprised at the clarity of her voice. "Get up, and show the men what for!"
Darell didn't move.
She hadn't expected him to, but she hadn't expected her reaction either. She had read many a book and see a good deal of plays involving death. She knew what was supposed to happen when you lost someone you loved.
But those were books. Thos were plays. In real life, it felt different. It didn't feel real. Like she was trapped in a nightmare, and she wouldn't know how badly it affected her till she woke up.
The men edged closer and stared at her and Darell. Anna sat up, gritting her teeth, and blocked their way to Darell.
"You got what you came for," she snapped brutally to the murderers. "Now leave."
They hesitated, looking at each other as if to ask one another, 'Do you know what she said?', then began a quick, murmured conversation. Anna couldn’t understand their language, but something told her that she wasn't supposed to.
Speaking in their native tongue, they asked the tallest and bravest looking of them all a question that spiraled him into silence. He took a breath, and then began to tentatively walk towards Anna and Darell.
She grabbed a stone from the ground and chucked it at him as hard as her arm would will. It rammed the side of his head and he stumbled back, glaring at the girl.
“Kuki e son,” said the man’s voice, dark and low. There was the sound of a few feet rustling in the grass, and they were gone as quickly as they had come.
“Yeah,” Anna shouted, as if she had just proved some huge point, "you better run!" But the words the man had spoken made her wish she understood, for she somehow knew they were important.
She turned to Darell, staring, waiting for it to become true. For Darell's death to matter and mean something. She turned him over and watched as his blood stuck to the ground, the huge puddle leaving a nasty stain on the ground. And still it didn't affect her, not in the least bit.
What are we going to do without him? It was a thought that was in her voice, but she couldn't remember thinking it.
‘We’ll survive,’ came the voice, as clear as a bell, tinkling. ‘The gift has been passed on, and pretty soon, the new magician will begin her training.’
At those words, Anna felt suddenly and unusually drained. She laid back down again, carefully, taking slow, deep breaths. She wrapped her hand with Darell's, which was now ice cold, like many of the dead patients. She looked at his pale face, just visible under his bark brown hair, and smiled at him.
Anna realized with a start that there was a voice in her head that as not her own. That part of the world, at least, seemed to become real and actually hit her with a pang of confusion.
Who are you?
‘I’m Magic,’ the voice whispered. As it died down within her mind, she felt darkness swirl around her, and fought to stay awake. With a heavy sigh, she let herself go, thinking only one more thing before she fell captive to unconsciousness.
I must be going insane.
Redundancy