Hello Tuesday (about my boy)

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Hello Tuesday.

Tiny flowers blossom,

In the middle of the awesome

Hour that you asked me that question.


I was watching leaves grow

In the back of my head

And instead, a caterpillar came rolling along.

Its little suction cup feet bring me joy.

But nothing like that of the boy.

The boy on my mind,

All the time, touching all the bubbles

That jiggle and poof.

Bubbles in my tummy,

Waiting for his touch.


Hello Tuesday,

I truly do adore you.

This boy found me sitting all alone

And picked me up and put me

On a cloud in a soft sky.

I saw his eyes,

And I stayed.


We stayed on the cloud

And I touched his brain

And he made me fly.


Hello Tuesday,

You gave this boy to me.

He asked me to accept him

And I took him all in.

And now he is mine,

And we are one.

My love for Tuesday is never done.




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Hey, Aloha,

In the assumption that this is a song, I think it's decent. (YWS has a separate Lyrics forum for song lyrics). Some of the lines could be versed better, in my opinion, for instance [the jiggle and poof/bubbles in my tummy]; it sounds a little awkward in-verse with the rest of the lines. I'm not very good at critiquing songs, or anything, so I'll just say good work, and keep it up.

June
(Also, I keep imagining this in tune with the melody of Jason Mraz's WordPlay)
"I'd steal somebody's purse if I could google it and then download it." -- Firestarter




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Thanks June, you always like to lend your thoughts :)
But this poem was just written specifically for my boy hahaha. Thank you. It wasn't meant for people to look deeply into, past what it is. Just for him to see on here and anyone can too I guess.



If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.
— Woodrow Wilson