I'm sorry that I have to say this, but this way too Twilight. Really, this screams Twilight! Boring town, hot guys, apples (really?), old truck, ugh! I hate that Ms.Meyer -or something- even came out with that book! It's killed writing as we know it. I hate to leave such a bad impression on you're first time here, but I can't bear seeing another one of these. Honestly if that dreaded series wasn't out and if you made a few changes this would be an okay story. Sorry again.
i, for one, thought it was very good! larkin remind me of damen off of vampire diaries, who, is infact, my favorite. way cooler then stephan. no need to be a hater loveless. if you need help, feel free to pm me! i cant wait to read more!
ps: dont pay to much attention to people wo diss your story, i think its amazing.
You do well to believe in God. Satan also believes...and trembles.James 2:19 http://dragcave.net/user/Roma-Gypsy ^ you should so click this....
Okay I have never read the Twilight books or seen th movies so I can't compare this story to the series. As long as you do not take directly from the books, it is okay to write a similar story. I think it is very well-written and I hope to read more.
I hafta agree with Summer. This was way too much like Twilight and the ever-crappy Vampire Diaries. I, personally, am sick of all things vampire.You obviously have writing talent. Come up with something original!This could be good if you would change the whole vampire-looking twin boys with contrasting personalities meet girl plot. Clear all vampire-related thoughts from your mind, and do some rewriting. I also think that you should take the advice of writers who do their part and review other people's stories, not that of the ones who don't review, use bad English, and diss other reviewers. PM me if you need help.
i thought it was a really good story and you obviously have a talent for writing but for me it was too twilight. i have to agree with some of the others, in that your obviously better than this so it wont be hard for you to think of something original.