uriel chapter 2

4 posts
Random avatar
Gender None specified
Points 5973
Reviews 23
Ok I actually planned to have this finished in a week and well I also planned for the chapter to be a bit longer but I dont think that after the chapters ending I could continue on.... So I think you'll all agree that it ended as it should and everything else needs to go in chapter 3 :). Unfortunatly this meant that the chapter was shorter than chapter 1 but who cares I felt it was done right!
Ok I warn you this chapter... well mainly its ending is just the start. NO ONE is safe and i mean that! I know I know 2nd chapter and already a shock part but as you'll see it was needed to build the character and continue on with showing his dark side cause man I tell you this dude has just started! I'm giving it a 16+ rating as I dunno if it would count as 18+ but I'm fairly sure a 12+ is way too low!
enjoy :) and hopefully review

Chapter 2: ten years later
I. The king awakes
The dawning sun shone into the room through an arched shaped window lighting it up only slightly. Yet everything in the room could be clearly seen. On the window's left sat a wardrobe full of the occupants clothing for all occasions and today's particular wears was the only one of its type in the wardrobe: A blue suit with, matching pants, white buttons and a two white stripes down each side.
On the wardrobe's right sat a purple table full of notes from the important meeting between Uriels kings which was due to continue tonight the night to discuss the continued peace between all the cities of Uriel.
The final object of interest in the bedroom was the big black bed covered with green blankets and sheets and underneath these lay the occupants of the room.
King Taylor of the Castle Takenight and his wife Queen Marie were sleeping peacefully next to each other resting up for the long day ahead.
Suddenly the door crashed open which caused the king and queen to jump straight out of the bed ready for attack but they stopped when they noticed it was their head servant Laundren.
“Laundren,” Started Taylor, “I've told you to stop doing that unless there is an attack and even than I'm sure we would know if a bunch of bloodthirsty barbarians were tearing down the doors.”
“Yes sir, I'm sorry but I felt you should know right away. Princess Tessa's bed is empty.”
“Oh dear I wonder where she has gotten to? She never gets up this early,” Taylor said a little concerned knowing that his daughter usually gets up ten minutes before class.
“Shall I send out a search for her majesty?” Laundren asked helpfully.
“No, at least not yet. I'm sure she's just in Cherry Woods visiting the animals.”
“Well darling,” Taylor said turning to his wife, “Shall we go back to bed for a few more hours? We will need it for the day ahead.”

II. Princess Tessa
Princess Tessa, who was an exact replica of her mother down to the exact same black hair, exited the Castle Takenight quietly as to not wake anyone as it was still early. She crept slowly over the great field where she and her friends, continuing the tradition begun by their parents, played soccer everyday.
She walked swiftly but silently over the damp grass towards Cherry woods.
Entering the woods she glanced at the whole paradise in front of her. Trees of every colour surrounded a pond with water as clear as glass.
She walked towards the pond with a bath in mind. Glancing around to make sure no one was looking, despite the fact it was early morning and no one was up, she removed her clothes and entered the pond.
She sat relaxing, as she soaked in the natural soaps, in the pond before she remembered why she had actually come to the forest.
I must get those flowers to surprise Uncle Rintol and Aunt Flavour she reminded herself. Rintol and Flavour were her two favourite people in the world and they rarely visited and yesterday they were far too busy with her father that she didn't even get to say hello to them but she was sure they wouldn't mind her visiting this morning.
Deciding that she had bathed long enough and so she didn't lose her train of thought again she got out and changed into her clothes.
She walked around the woods searching for that special type of flower she knows that Uncle Rintol and Aunt Flavour like. She finally found a patch of Blazing Thunders, A black and red rose, and picked a dozen of them while humming happily.
Something sniffed her from behind as she was walking to the woods exit in the direction back to the castle and she jumped in alarm only to find it was Blinter; her Brown Labrador.
“Blinter,” She said patting the dog, “I've told you don't do that to me! Go now, I have important things to do this morning.” To which Blinter replied with a lick of Tessa's face followed by a quick turn around tail in the air walking out of the woods.
Tessa followed Blinter out of the woods but the dog decided to head for the stables, no doubt to talk to the horses, while Tessa headed back towards the castle flowers in hand.

III. Later that day The Group get together for a tradition
“Tessa is late! She better hurry up or we can't start,”Princess Harmony of Standsworth said to The Group as they stood on the field.
They were ready for that days soccer game but Tessa hadn't turned up yet. None of them had seen her but this wasn't unusual as none of them took the same classes as her anyway.
The Group, as they called them self following their parents tradition, was built up of Princess Harmony daughter to King Thimothy and Queen Sanity, her brother Prince Taylor, who was named in honour to one of Thimothy's best friends, Prince Marcus of Grail son to King Gaylord and Queen Rossa, Prince Desmond of Protila son of King Gabriel and Queen seven, Princess Amy of Falicide Daughter to King Stranli and named after her mother who died during childbirth, Princess Tide of Twintle daughter to King Salador and Queen Ripple, Princess Dimitrov of Castle Icewind daughter to King Rintol and Queen Flavour and of course Princess Tessa of Castle Takenight daughter of Queen Marie and King Taylor.
They all stood on the field in their positions, except for Dimitrov who was referee, waiting impatiently for Tessa.
They were all only eight at the moment but according to their families and teachers they were very mature for their age so much that they already had battle class added to their days which many children don't take until the age of thirteen.
“She better come soon or we will have to start without her,” Marcus said impatiently.
“We can't do that! How are we to play with only seven players on the field?” Desmond demanded.
“Well Dimitrov can take Tessa's place and we can just have no referee this time,” Amy piped up.
“We can't do that!” Harmony said in shock, “That would break tradition!”
“Well Tessa has already broken tradition by being late hasn't she?” Amy replied really wanting to get the game on with.
“Fine,” Harmony said giving in, “Dimitrov come in,”
Dimitrov, happy to finally be able to play on the field, hugged Harmony and forgetting that she wasn't referee blew the whistle to start the game.

Iv. Tessa part 2
Tessa entered the castle happily and walked up the main stairwell flowers in hand. She was excited to see Rintol and Flavour and had the urge to run to their room but didn't as she was sure everyone was still sleeping as today was an important day so they all needed to rest up. She was sure that Rintol and Flavour weren't still asleep as they were always known for their early mornings. When she hit the top of the staircase she turned to the right and made her way to the Snail Wing named for the fact that it was actually shaped like a snail.
Tessa made her way to the room Rintol and Flavour were staying in during their stay, for the discussions, at Castle Takenight. She was just about to knock on the door when she was stopped in her tracks as she heard yelling in the room.
Curious she pressed her ear to the door and heard Rintol's voice inside.
“Its going to fucking happen today darling and that is that I'm not going to hold this shit off any longer! Do you know how hard it is to stop myself from just getting a sword and cutting of everyone's heads? I'd love to start with that bastard Taylor than take those two little shits out right now!” she heard him say... Rintol... her favourite person in the world. The person who she thought had no bad bits in him. She had never seen him even show any anger even when a bad thing did happen and she certainly didn't hear him ever say anything bad about her father.
“But darling you don't even have a plan,” She heard Flavour reply, “I mean you don't even know if it will work! And even if it does do you think anyone will side with you? Can you imagine a war between us and all of the kingdoms around Uriel? We won't stand a chance!”
“Darling,” Rintol said calmly but forcefully, “Do you think I had this whole thing planned for ten years and I would let it go all down the shitter like that? I already have made a deal with all the dragons and giants that I could! It will go down you just wait,”
Tessa, who was crying, couldn't take anymore and kicked the door in anger. As the door opened she heard her brain say, “Run away!” but she stood frozen in place and the next moment her two favourite people in the world stood in front of her.
They both grabbed her and dragged her, without struggle, in the room.
“What did you hear?” Rintol asked in a kind voice she was used to.
“E-e-e-everything,” She stuttered between tears.
“That's a shame isn't it?” Rintol said drawing a dagger out of his pants.
Tessa eyed the knife drawing closer to her throat and than it was done.
She dropped to the floor and as the blood spilled out of her throat she looked deep in the eyes of her favourite person in the world and as that last drop exited she realised it had all been a lie.




Random avatar
Gender None specified
Points 5973
Reviews 23
for anyone interested I plan to draw a map right now to pretty much remind me where everyone, creatures, kingdoms, cities etc are located....it will be much more helpful on me and my crap memory :)




User avatar
Gender Female
Points 1326
Reviews 6
Yay, action! :smt003
Once again, great story. However, once again, I saw errors in grammar and comma usage. Also, I felt that Tessa's death was a little rushed.

"Tessa eyed the knife drawing closer to her throat and than it was done."

Also, you meant "then it was done", right?

But, hey, I rush a lot of things in my stories too, so who am I to talk? :xd:

Tessa's death: :thud:
"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."
~Anonymous




Random avatar
Gender None specified
Points 5973
Reviews 23
noobcake666 wrote:Yay, action! :smt003
Once again, great story. However, once again, I saw errors in grammar and comma usage. Also, I felt that Tessa's death was a little rushed.

"Tessa eyed the knife drawing closer to her throat and than it was done."

Also, you meant "then it was done", right?

But, hey, I rush a lot of things in my stories too, so who am I to talk? :xd:

Tessa's death: :thud:

edit: i reread and you mean her death wasnt described and all that? i dunno i mean killing her off is one thing but describing the throat cutting of an 8 yr old girl.... think thatd put me upto r18 :P... which i dont mind so i might consider it
Also I've never known the difference between then and than :S:S:S
Again glad you enjoyed it :). Writing chapter 3 now which will most likely come with a map written so I don't forget everything. Chapter 3 will most likely be up in a week unless I sit down today and just bring it all out :P
Thanks



cron
Well, if I can't get this chapter to work....at least I will have exercised my fingers.
— Kaia