Very well done, Pink. I love the battle descriptions and movements. One thing I picked out, when Zack says, "I told you I was coming" you forgot the 'you' and you switch from demons to Demons. Keep one. That's all I found for nitpicks. But, this was too short! I want more! haha. See you around.
-Jayleigh
"Only love heals. Anger, guilt, and fear can only destroy and separate you from your true capabilities."-Damen
I absolutely love this! just love, love, love!! I haven't found a single thing wrong with any of the chapters, it has everything I want in a book, and more. Please post more soon! Please and thank you, Addawen.
The heart wants, the body needs, and the mind suffers. - me
Hi! I loved it, loved the descriptions and the characters but I really have to reiterate what I said: it sounds like the Mortal Instruments. I'm sorry but I had to mention it. Maybe that will change with the next chapters. I'll read on
Yeah I know, I'm a total Cassandra Clare fan. Don't worry it's just the beginning that seems similar to Mortal Instruments. The next chapters are like, way off. I'm glad you all like it by the way!
~Pink
There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are. -W. Somerset Maugham
