Anyway, all the bull crap happening right now, me losing my house, computer still busted, ain't got no damn money to fix the 1965 cadi and to top it all off I am insane now! ELOL (Evil Laugh Out Loud)! But if one thing has come good from this is that my insanity seems to have giving me a higher state of consciousness and has made me more twisted and sinister in my writing.
Hell, I somewhat surprise myself on what I have written. I abandoned the whole "Exile Thieves" thing; finding that I have found a 2004 word file of my fan-fiction of the animated series "Teen Titans". I viewed the five year old file and laughed at my naiveness and feebleness I wrote back then... but I got a sinister idea that went perfectly for my MC of my mainline story (MLS).
I did a bit of editing of the second part of the (MLS) to reflect the MC decisions and his influences that ultimately prelude to one of the most dark and unknown characters of the animated series... "Raven". Of course there is a part between II and III that basically preludes to IV where my MC meets the Titans. Hell V is close to beginning! I shall cease there about the whole damn series for it is still in construction...
The insanity I have does not mean I am a crazy homicidal person. It has given me a higher state of consciousness, I perceive more and ultimately that has boost my creativity ten fold... but it also comes with more malice. I refer to girls and women as "Females" in my story and as I think to myself. I am sorry if I offend anyone, but it is what insanity has giving me. Things that I thought of never writing for my modesty before have broken through and they are pretty damn twisted even for me...
My writing has became more malevolent but somewhat more professional. I ain't saying that I am the best damn writer in the world, for even I know that my skill is far beyond from being perfected. But I have to say that I have never seen such superior writing from myself... hell I knew that I was "good, superior, one of the best, etc" as praised from 1st grade to college professors/instructors, but what I have read in the past does not come near from what insanity, darkness and rage has made me conjured. Hell I wouldn't never seen myself using the word "Conjured"... sounds sinister, I like that... gotta add that in the story.
Anyway that is all I go to say now, for I am exhausted and fatigued from writing and surviving in this damn reality that the creator has given to us. My dreams will probably give me something to add in into the story as they always do. I accept my insanity, hell I heard Edgar Ellen (did I spell that right?) was insane; so...
"HELL YEAH!" I roar out in a hazed insanity trapt within a room filled with darkness; that is repelled by the immense rage that surges through my veins. "Damn I am crazy... no insane, but it's all that I've got," I say to myself for the 634th time.
Later...
Chaos Angelfish
