The next day I managed to get away early by saying that Carl was going to meet me one last time before he left. Now that he was almost gone, my family was beginning to tease me a little about sweethearts and long goodbyes. I laughed along, not knowing exactly what to think. First chance I got, I went back down the beach to where I’d left Carl last night.
Just before I reached the spot, I looked to the side to see a tail cresting out of the water. I swallowed and continued my way to the rocks.
“I see you decided to come,” Carl said when he saw me. He was faster in the water than I’d been on land, having reached the location before I did.
I sat down on the beach, behind a rock. “I did agree I would.”
“Do you forgive me then?”
“I don’t know,” I said slowly. “I don’t even know if I can forgive you.”
Carl nodded. “In your place, I’m not sure if I would forgive me either.” He gave me a lopsided smile, and I returned it despite myself. I felt my lungs suddenly expand, as if a laugh had died.
“What I know I can’t do is forget this summer.” I looked at my hand. “Including the fact that you lied to me.”
“And should you want me to never come back because of that, I understand,” Carl said.
Almost on their own accord, my fingers started tracing patterns in the sand. Carl seemed to know I wasn’t ready to answer him yet. I let my vision cloud over as my hand moved. No matter how much I tried to think, I just couldn’t. The shock was still fresh, as were my memories. My hand, still moving without my thought, left the sand. I let myself look at what I’d drawn.
A heart.
For a moment I just stared at what I’d done. I was about to erase it, but I realized I couldn’t. I couldn’t erase the image, the memory, the person.
“Would—” I stopped to clear my suddenly tight throat. “Would you have left anyway?”
Carl nodded. “I don’t like staying by the coast during the winter. Not this far north.” He shivered, and I thought I caught a muttered comment about snow.
I stifled a chuckle. “But snow is so pretty!”
He bit his lip, but I could see the corners of his mouth rise as he, unsuccessfully, tried not to laugh. “Not from underwater it’s not.”
I gave up trying not to laugh at this point. I covered my mouth in some vain attempt to keep some of my giggles in, but I knew that was failing. He swam a little closer, no longer holding back his smile.
My laughter died off with a sigh. “I don’t want you to catch a cold.”
“But, that’s only a risk…” Carl’s voice trailed off. His eyes brightened. “Do you want me to come back next summer?”
I stood up and brushed sand off my rear. “I believe in second chances.” I didn’t say what was on my mind though. I couldn’t make such a choice so quickly. Not with the memories I had.
He swam over to a stone near the shore and pulled himself up on it. There was something in his hand, what looked like a shell attached to some seaweed. My attention was soon drawn to his tail. In the morning light I could now see the colour of his scales; slate blue. They were a contrast to the rather reddish rock of the stone. He beckoned me over. I looked at him, then the lighthouse. We were out of view enough, and the water would be shallow enough I could just blame wet sandals on having walked in the tide. Carl was getting an insistent look in his eye; I realized that he wasn’t going to say whatever he wanted to if I stayed on shore.
When I still hesitated, he frowned. “I’m not going to hurt you.”
I was about to snap that I wasn’t worried about him hurting me, when I realized I was. The risk of him hurting me from impatience was growing by the second, so I walked through the surf to the stone. The water rose to near my knee; my muscles cramping on contact. I had to grind my teeth to climb up the rock.
Just before I slipped, Carl grabbed me and hoisted me up next to him. “You’re alright?”
I rubbed my calves to try and put some warmth back in them. “Nothing major.”
He let my answer stand and reached beside him. He pulled out what I had seen him holding before. Now that I was closer, I could see it was supposed to be a necklace. One end had a ring of coral, the other a bar. I had seen this kind of clasp before, but never in such a marital. Carl seemed to notice my reaction.
“Didn’t think we could do that, did you?” He smiled and put the necklace in my hand. “This is to let you know when I’ve returned. The shell will begin to glow when I’m by this beach.”
I took it carefully, making sure that the seaweed wasn’t too slimy. To my surprise it was rather dry and flexible. Not something I would expect.
“Won’t this dry out?”
Carl shook his head. “No, not so long as it’s near the water. It’s been spelled not to dry. Just make sure nobody sees the clasp, should they ask— ” He looked out towards the sea, suddenly distracted. “I have to go. My parents are waiting.”
I looked where he was and saw a man and woman in the water. I paused before lifting my hand to wave. They were just as hesitant to wave back. It was almost as if they were doing it for Carl’s sake.
Carl put his hand on my neck to keep my head still and kissed my cheek. “Goodbye Alexandra. See you next summer.” Before I could respond he dove off the rock and swam away. I sat there for a moment, getting over the suddenness of the kiss. I half-hoped he’d turn around, but he never surfaced where I could see. Once enough time had passed so he’d be out of view, I climbed down from the rock and went back to shore. The necklace went from my hand to my back pocket so I wouldn’t have to explain myself.
As I walked, I found myself looking forward to next summer.
*
The end of school once again brought me walking along the beach. I went right to the jagged rocks where Carl had said goodbye to me ten months before. He was on the same rock, waiting for me. I went and sat beside him and we told each other what we’d been up to. It was like our conversations before, only now he had a tail. I wasn’t sure when I forgave him, but I had. He didn’t try to trick me again, and I found that enough. We spent the whole summer like that, sitting on the rock and talking. Sometimes I’d be the only one on the rock as Carl took to the water. I couldn’t join him, not without my parents finding out. I didn’t want to tell them just in case they thought I was crazy. Besides, Carl seemed to want his true form to be kept secret.
Ever after, I spent at least part of my summer on the beach. Even once I’d moved away and gotten a human boyfriend, I still went back to that beach every summer and spent at least some time talking to Carl. He eventually told me why he’d shown me his tail: so I wouldn’t be left wondering why he’d never kissed me. I was always glad he had shown me, because I gained one of the best friends I’d ever gotten.
So here my story ends. Not happily, not unhappily. That summer just became what was. And ever after, I always looked to the sea, holding a seaweed and shell necklace in my hand, hoping it would glow.
