Prologue- Jolts Of Love

Good stuff.

First off, there are a few grammatical problems. Re-read it carefully, and you'll find them. (I like to read it backwards so that I'm seeing it in a different light than I wrote it.) Similarly, you say that this character is from a family of five, but I counted eight...

Other than that, it seems too short. It might just be a prologue, but that doesn't limit its length. The prologue should set this thing up. Really, this seems like it could easily be added to a first chapter. Even then, it's still quite short.

Some tips. Use the beginning to do some more character building, or simply add more physical description. The plane crash was nicely written, but it was kind of abrupt. Set the scene more, and then introduce the dilemma. Add more events as to how they got to this point. There are going to be distinct character interactions before the crash because the character has this family. Does he get along with his parents? Is he close to his brothers? Why or why not? Why does Isabella care for him so much? It seems like these people are going to be central to your character, so allow them to interact.

Just some suggestions. Write some more. I'd like to see how you incorporate this into a pirate story.

Hola there! I'll be your reviewer today ^^. And if you don't like my adivce you can ignore it ^^. Ok now I don't know much on planes but maybe you could describe the memory of the first plane crash

It was only a small two passenger, with a single engine which failed suddenly. We were sent plunging into a group of trees

What kind of plane? Where exactly was the main character at? Where they having quality time up in the plane?

my father Dave

I don't know how old he {I'm assuming someone fairly young in this memory} is but usually people don't refer to their parents by their first names unless they have a fairly tense realtionship, know what I mean?

And like the last reviewer said, it did seem a little too short, there a few grammer mistakes, though it'd be awesome to see how it turns out as a pirate story. And if ya don't like my advice you could always ignore it ^^. Bye!

Hello

I agree with both of the others, you did suffer a few grammatical problems, but then that is expected, but overall I thought that was a really good piece and it really worked well, but I thought you could have built it up a bit more, and left us in suspense, and maybe not have told us as much information as you did

but other than that it was good
I like your style well done

have any questions? Pm me!