Want to be! (Hard Rock)

Your dark might!
Glowing in the black light!
All stuck in your head.
Your imagination is going wild.

I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The strongest sentinel.

I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The greatest hero.

Sitting, on your school desk!
Dreaming how you are going to beat the bad guys!
But still can’t win, isn’t it a mystery?
You are losing because of your jealousy.


I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The strongest sentinel.

I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The greatest hero.

Dreaming for revenge…
You can’t wait till you bit your bullies…
Can’t you realize?
If you won’t do a thing your strength dies…

After the kid spits in your face!
You run away in disgrace!
You go back home dreaming,
What it would be like if you would win?

Just fight, don’t dream! (Echo X2)

(Guitar solo)


I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The strongest sentinel.

I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The greatest hero.


Next morning Tim the boy gets up!
Ready for another smack down lost!
But he makes up his mind,
And throws his foolish imagination away


Because he knows he won’t win,
Won’t win,
Knows he won’t win,
With his Imagination.

It is time to get real,
Get real,
Time to get real,
Throw your fist up in the air.


I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The strongest sentinel.

I only want to be,
Want to be,
I only want to be,
The greatest hero.

Instead of wasting time dreaming,
Do what you waited for!
I swear you will win another score!
Do what you need to do and make it happen.


I only want to be,
Want to be,
Only want to be,
The greatest hero.

your anger definitely comes through in this the chorus is great, but maybe only put " i only want to be the strongest sentinel, i only want to be the greatest hero" because the repition becomes a bit much that and it would definatly be hard to scream. the idea of the kid and his bullies is very real and scary which is good considering the type of music. all in all its a decent song just work on the flow.
~ Leslie~

Good overall concept, I didn't like it as much as some of the other songs of yours I've read.
I could hear a tune going in my head as I read this, who knows if its the same as yours
The lines that stood out to me that I thought got off with the flow were:
1st verse - 'your imagination is going wild'. I read it better without the 'is'.
2nd verse - 'Dreaming how you are going to beat the bad guys'. I think I would break this up.
2nd verse- 'You are losing because of your jealously.' You could probably cut out some words or break up this line too, although I do really like this line. I don't know why, but it's one of my favorites.
3rd verse- 'You can't wait till you bit your bullies'. First of all, is 'bit' a typo? Again, this doesn't flow well for me.
3rd verse- 'If you won't do a think your strength dies'. I like this line too but it's too long I think, it doesn't fit in with the shorter lines.

lordgluzman wrote:After the kid spits in your face!
You run away in disgrace!
You go back home dreaming,
What it would be like if you would win?

I like this stanza.


Who knows though? The tune going in my head could be completly different than yours and yours may flow better.


That's all I got

-Carly

Thanks guys, sorry I havent been on for more then 4 months beacuse of school and vacation.