To see or not to see
I only want you?
To know or not to know that I -
undeniably, with the tenacity of steel -
will follow you without regret?
To choose or not to choose
to know and to care and to hold and to cherish?
One cold month without the fire
of five hundred thousand years ago,
I wept in agonizing numbness,
thirty one days of thirty minutes till midnight
just hanging on,
just keeping
without hope of never rotting.
then it was the February of our discontent
which was, of course, better than nothing
though i could not realize it,
being frozen in ice at the time, that
of cynicism and of misanthropy.
and then a chisel Marched through
and harsh sunlight, and brazen flame, and split
me out
of it
rollinginto ajumbledpile on thefloor,
of w e t f l e s h andmeltedskin and dis
comb
obul
ated
eyesand organsand nervesand
suddenly
your needle took the time
to sew me into something recognizable,
though the thread was cloying.
but that sicklysweetnesssmell had faded
by the time
i realized
I was in love with you.
and spring blossomed into
april.
Rachel.
angel.
To love or not to love - after three short months -
after eighteen short years -
I have only been human, but -
to love or not to love
me?
that - this - we - are the question.
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Thanks for reading. =)
