The Olden Days

Hope you don't think it's too bad.

Feel free to rip to shreds!
-Y



The Olden Days

What happened to the ball gowns?
To the the dusty ageing road?
To the happy, healthy children?
To the message sent in code?

Has the peace gone by that quickly?
Are we being led astray?
I knew that time would change things,
But did they really mean this way?

Another day in wonder,
What the passing day will bring.
A birth, a death, an injury,
A wondrous, merry thing?

Have you seen the morning paper?
Have you watched the evening news?
Do you know just what goes on at night?
Or why detectives search for clues?

No crying, screaming people,
No cut, disabled child.
No bullets shot so freely,
Not like this modern wild.

Weren’t people much politer?
Didn’t strangers invite you in?
Wasn’t school more meaningful?
Wasn’t there less sin?

Remember penny candies?
When gas was twenty cents?
Remember ballroom dancing?
When we were dames and gents?

Yes, the olden days were better,
I’m sure you would agree.
For why dwell in present danger,
When you can live in fantasy?

I really enjoyed your rhyming scheme, especially in your 4th and 5th stanzas. To me they captured the most meaning of the entire piece. I really don't have any suggestions except for your final stanza. The line "When you can live in fantasy?" doesn't seem to capture the full meaning of the poem. Its a good line, but not quite appropriate to finish the poem off with. Other than that great work!

XYZinnia wrote:
What happened to the ball gowns?
To the the dusty aging road?
To the happy, healthy children?
To the message sent in code? I think "messages" would sound better.

Has the peace gone by that quickly?
Are we being led astray?
I knew that time would change things,
But did they really mean this way?

Another day in wonder,
What the passing day will bring.
A birth, a death, an injury,
A wondrous, merry thing?

Have you seen the morning paper?
Have you watched the evening news?
Do you know just what goes on at night?
Or why detectives search for clues?

No crying, screaming people,
No cut, disabled child. The word "cut" doesn't sound quite right. Could you put another word?
No bullets shot so freely,
Not like this modern wild.

Weren’t people much politer?
Didn’t strangers invite you in?
Wasn’t school more meaningful?
Wasn’t there less sin?

Remember penny candies?
When gas was twenty cents?
Remember ballroom dancing?
When we were dames and gents?

Yes, the olden days were better, The last two lines don't flow too well, but it's not a big deal.
I’m sure you would agree.
For why dwell in present danger,
When you can live in fantasy?

This is a good poem. It flows well, sticks to a rhyme scheme, and has an interesting point. I really like it. I'd just advise you fix the few mistakes I marked in bold, and this poem will be even better. I do agree J. C. Belding that the ending doesn't quite fit with the rest of the poem, but it's really not bad. Altogether, well done, and please, keep writing!